Question

I'm in a 2 and a half year relationship with this girl,we don't live together,and we are in our mid 30's.

How often do you contact your partner in an average day if you don't live with him/her ??
in any way via text messsages,phone,instant messaging etc?
Are you always the first to call/send text??


i'm asking you this because in my case i'm always the first to start everything,and the impression i've got sometimes is that if it wasn't for me days would pass by without hearing or reading anithing from her.

falcon,

Ideally, it should be mutual. It's hard to feel safe when it is not mutual. On the other hand, you should not expect her to call you as frequently as you do call her. Actually the more you call her the more she feels comfortable in not calling you. Some girls like it this way, to heighten their self-esteem. Others might feel too shy to initiate an approach, fearing of possible rejection feelings in case you don't get the phone call or you are busy.

Anyway, more important I think is how does she react when you call her. Her tone of voice will tell a lot.

There is not a rule of frequency, it depends one personality, life stile, and stage of the relationship. For me if we are not sleeping together then the contact tends to be daily, because I only like very passionate relationships. Unless something when wrong between us. In any case, for me one week without contact for me feels terrible.

In your situation, I would particularly do this trick... I would try to make her call me, maybe by not calling her for some time, then when she did call me I would get the phone call very enthusiastically and show my happiness. This would encourage her to do it again.

ok thanks