Fat (adipophilia) & Weight Gain Fetish

Hello, I'm new to the forum but I expect to be fairly active
I am 22 years old and I am a female. I've had a fat/weight gain fetish since as long as I can remember. I was molested as a child (once when I was four, by a neighbor) but I could never really relate my fetish to that situation, so I don't know if that's useful information or not... I'll just throw it here just in case
I know this fetish isn't extremely dangerous per se, but I have to admit to myself that encouraging someone to stay fat/gain weight isn't healthy either.
I was once in a 'serious' relationship (he was a little overweight) but I never told him about my fetishes. The sex was unsatisfying to say the least and I've never slept with anyone else. I've only ever came by masturbating to my fantasies. I am starting to fear that I'll never be able to have a real relationship with anyone... I don't want to hurt my partners, but I really don't know how deal with these things I feel! Please help me, I really need to talk to someone who knows what I'm going though...

Lucy.

Hi, Lucy! If you don't mind my asking, why was the sex with your ex unsatisfying? Maybe you'll find someone who you can share your fantasies with some day and he'll be understanding. How are you?

Thank you for replying! I'm sorry it took me so long to answer.

I don't really know the reason I didn't enjoy myself with him. I can get myself off just fine, but I get very anxious when someone else is involved. I am now dating a new (slightly chubby <3) guy, who 'knows' about my preferences (I say 'knows' because he probably thinks it is just a 'preference', I don't know him well enough to trust him with my most intimate secret just yet) and we slept together once. It wasn't great but it was definitely better than with my ex (at least this guy was trying!) I hope that we'll get to know each other better and we will have a more profound discussion on the subject.

Again, thank you for your reply

Cool! I hope you'll find a deep connection with your new guy and that he'll be understanding

Wow, this is really old xD But I still have the same paraphilia, go figure.

Things with the guy I mentioned earlier didn't work out. I slept with him once more and ended up bleeding for a week cause I couldn't get aroused from 'normal' stimulation. So I said 'no thank you, nice to meet you, bye'.

I'm beginning to fear I can only get aroused by indulging in this fetish, which would really suck, because it would mean that I could just date guys who have the same fetish or sex our life would basically be non-existent.

My problem right now is that my ex-best friend came on to me about 2 months ago. He said he couldn't be my friend any more, that he adored me and that he wanted us to be together. My reasoning back then was 'If I tell him no, I'm gonna lose my best friend', so I said yes. I thought I could at least try. We haven't slept together yet but it's gonna happen eventually and I'm afraid it's not going to be very good. I WANT us to work, I adore him, but I know I need to be stimulated through this fetish. And he's just a sweet skinny guy who knows about feedism only the few things I've told him and tries not to freak out.

I'm gonna break his heart, my own, I'm going to lose a bunch of good friends, and all because my brain decided to fart at some point in my development and now I can't get off without this stupid stupid fetish. I feel so frustrated I've been crying my eyes out all afternoon.

Hi, I am also new here on this forum and I can understand exactly what you must be experiencing as I have the same fantasy but then in the reverse of what you have. It's actually quiet amazing to read of your fantasy. I have this thing where I want to be fattened up and gain weight for a slim female. I don't have such a female in my life and therefore I have resorted to fattening myself up. I am still not really very fat though. I am of normal build and tall and slim but since I have gotten a bit older (I am 29 now) I noticed that it is becoming easier suddenly to gain weight. Especially round my waist and belly and upper torso. I realize it's probably bad for my health in the long run but I am totally addicted to the thought. I often wear tight t-shirts hoping to get a response from some of my slim female friends or even slim females I don't know at all about me putting on weight. That gives me such a high. I don't know how to put a stop to it though and it's like a secret I carry within me that I cant talk about. The idea of there being a slim female who enjoys fattening me up also really appeals to me a lot but it does worry me a little that I will then really slowly start becoming real fat and obese and completely loose the slim body I once had. I really don't know what to do about it but if it would help you with your fantasy to help me with my fantasy maybe we could be of help to each other.
Regards
Fred