I'm Probably The Only One, But...

does anyone else intentionally look for people who hate pedophiles? I sometimes find myself searching through google for things like "pedophiles are evil" and "kill all pedos", and read the things people say about us.

Why do I do it? Well, after I mistakenly responded to this thread: paraphilias/topic66407.html ( read with caution) I got really upset and later took several sleeping pills. Not enough, obviously, but still. I chickened out after a couple a pills, so I guess I keep hoping I'll find something that will push me over the edge and give me the courage to finally go through with it.

There is quite a range of paraphilias to be found out there, some easier for others to accept than others. It makes one ask the question, where does the line need to be drawn?

I see paraphiliacs actully judging other paraphiliacs surprisingly frequently, which I find immensely unfair. We don't want to be judged for our kinks/fets/prefrences, yet we're quick to jump at others.

Pedophilia is a difficult para in the sense where it's probably the least easy to accept by society. Mind you, I stopped listening to mainstream years ago, so I try to approach everyone with an open mind. I too have an extreme paraphilia, and go looking on line for things that people say about necrophiliacs. I've read some hurtful things about us myself, not enough to make me suicidal, but still, things that put me in a rather solemn mood for weeks none the less, so no, you are definitely not the only one. I think in a way, we do it because we are unsure of ourselves. Even though we are knowingly seeking rejection, deep down, somewhere, we are seeking approval. Perhaps a sense of approval we know we'll never find, still, we hold out hope, even if we are really seeking that approval from ourselves, on a subconscious level.

I used to do that but it only made me angry at the ignorant people rather myself (I had not done anything wrong!). For me I just did not understand why people hated paedophiles simply for being what they were. I never found a logical reason. It was always irrational fear mixed with speculation at what all paedophilies will definitely do in X or Y situations. The worst part is 'paedophile' seems to have been confused with 'child molestor' and so some of the hatred is misplaced.

There is absolutely no reason to kill yourself. Do you honestly find yourself agreeing with those arrogant witch-burners? If the consensus was 'all paedophiles should burn their houses down and become vegans' would you do it? Maybe you should appraise yourself based on what you know you can offer the world rather than taking in that baseless diatribe spewed from the most clue-less of society's mobs.

And throw those pills away!

Even though I am a pedophile, I really don't get upset by the people that want to kill me or hate me. The ones that make it there mission in life to get rid of pedophiles I feel are hiding some inner demons that they can't get rid of and want to but the only way that they can is to talk bad about pedophiles and all that. I used to get a thrill out of chatting with people that hate me just because I am attracted to children, yet not so much anymore and really don't pay em that much attention.

Disclaimer: i am a non - i feel that im intruding in a way, but hope its ok that i post whats on my mind.

I read the thread mentioned in the OP and it actually made me feel horrible too. It was very hateful. Im sad to hear how it affected you, 322.
Its should not that hard to understand the difference between a pedophile and a childmolestor, if you have half a brain! its not that hard to empethise with the struggling and pain some of you go through. I find many of the posters here very sympathetic, and i feel bad for the things they have to feel. Many posts have left me feeling very humble, i think about my own half assed attempts to better myself in my life and see that some people show a lot of bravery to get help and face their own demons.
Most of all the forum did open my eyes that there are such big differences, in here as anywhere else. So 322 please dont assume that no outsiders will try to see the human behind the paraphelia. I think many would react as i do upon reading this. Being in a group so often demonised must be so hard, but its really not hard to see that the image the media paints is wrong about most pedophiles.

Bottom line: I think MOST will do a better job with understanding than the poster in the thread you referred to.

Now im gonna bugger off cause i really feel like i shouldnt be posting here hijacking others forums (will stick to reading), but i do wanna say this: its been a privelege to be able to read and understand more about this and for that i thank you all