Does liking children mean im a pedophile?

by **YarlSoutan** » Tue Dec 30, 2008 11:07 pm

I like little girls, from the time they learn to walk and so on. I like to snuggle with them and watch them smile, and to make them smile. They are just so cute and innocent.
I dont think of them sexually, though I have had fantasys I did not want. I would never molest a child, yet they tell me im a pedophile. Why cant I love children because i am a male? People see inside me and think im a child molester because I like kids. So I can never be happy. I hate little boys though. They anger and sicken me. They will all grow up to be bad people.

Hi,

Who says that you are a paedophile?; and what is your relationship with these girls? I mean, are they relatives of yours or are they, like, your students (if you're a teacher). We can all like children because they are innocent and carefree, but we must not act on any sexual desires we may have for them. You know this already, but I felt obliged to reiterate it.

Kevin

by **Butterfly Faerie** » Wed Dec 31, 2008 1:19 am

IF you do not have sexual thoughts for a child etc .. why do you not like little boys, is it not young children in general etc? You were once a child as well, remember that, where does that hatred come from?

This is a rough estimate of the definition of a pedophile.

Pedophilia is a paraphilia that involves an abnormal interest in children. A paraphilia is a disorder that is characterized by recurrent intense sexual urges and sexually arousing fantasies generally involving: nonhuman objects; the suffering or humiliation of oneself or one's partner (not merely simulated); or animals, children, or other nonconsenting persons. Pedophilia is also a psychosexual disorder in which the fantasy or actual act of engaging in sexual activity with prepubertal children is the preferred or exclusive means of achieving sexual excitement and gratification. It may be directed toward children of the same sex or children of the other sex. Some pedophiles are attracted to both boys and girls. Some are attracted only to children, while others are attracted to adults as well as to children.

Pedophilia is defined by mental health professionals as a mental disorder, but the American legal system defines acting on a pedophilic urge as a criminal act.

by **paraphiliac187** » Wed Dec 31, 2008 1:32 am

It doesn't sound like you are a pedophile if you don't have sexual fantasies about them though not liking boys wouldn't make it go either way I don't think. Keep track of your feelings and if the urges intensify I would look into getting help.

by S3 » Wed Dec 31, 2008 3:27 pm

YarlSoutan, it sounds like there's something else behind just cuddling that you'd like to do with girls. Is there? Of course, it's not the fantasy that's bad, but how you act with it.

ButterflyFaerie's definition is correct, but I'll add that the recurrent intense sexual urges of any true paraphilia will interfere with "normal" or happy living. That's why I think professionals call it a disorder.

by **YarlSoutan** » Wed Dec 31, 2008 8:54 pm

Their flesh feels so good I want to feel every inch of it. I wish I could merge with them and absorb them into my own body to protect and nurture them. But its nothing sexually...i dont think. People who molest children make me want to cry. Only monsters would ruin innocence. What all counts as molesting a child?

by **Lostson** » Wed Dec 31, 2008 10:07 pm

If it is nothing sexual I guess then it is not a paraphilia.

As for the irrational anger focused at young males I have this too except I have it for all young things. Baby animals for example make me furious with how innocent they are my therapist thinks it stems from a belief that I didn’t get to have my innocence so why should they have theirs. Although I have this anger inside me I can recognize that it is irrational. It might be worthwhile to look at why you feel this way you might be surprised at the answers you find.

Molest Defined by my therapists doing anything for sexual gratification of someone with out the consent of the other person. *Note: Children can never give consent.

So for example you touched a girls arm at the park and I gave you a slight arousal that would be defined as molestation.

by **Chucky** » Wed Dec 31, 2008 10:18 pm

Hi,

What is your relationship with these kids? I asked this in my previous post but you are yet to answer. I get the feeling that you are not molesting these children but that your thoughts are rather inapropriate. However, I don't think that you would ever do anything to harm these children, whatever their relationship to you is.

Think of 'molestation' as a sexual attack on someone.

by S3 » Thu Jan 01, 2009 1:04 am

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/molestation
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Molest#Sex ... n.2Fminors

by **Butterfly Faerie** » Thu Jan 01, 2009 3:10 am

A child molester is any older child or adult who touches a child for his or her own sexual gratification.

Child molestation is the act of sexually touching a child.

A child is a girl or boy who is 13 years of age or younger.

There does seem to be more going on hereregarding this though not sure what....

Does liking children mean im a pedophile?

Does liking children mean im a pedophile?

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