I am sexually attracted to children

I often find myself consumed with thoughts of angelic little children, naked, dancing, in front of me. They whisper sweet things in my ear and begin to touch me. I masturbate to these thoughts. I am beginning to think that I'm insane.

Please help me.

Hi, welcome to the forums.

Being attracted to children isn't a bad thing. Now, I know that sounds crazy, but it's not. What's bad is acting out those thoughts on a child. There isn't a thing on this planet that someone isn't sexually attracted to. If you're simply just thinking of these scenarios and masturbating to them, then that's fine. I'm friends with two people that do that. They're never touched a child or looked at child porn or anything along those lines, they just use their imagination in the privacy of their own home.

If it does get to the point where the thoughts and the urges get to the point where you have serious plans or intentions to look at child porn or molest/rape/have sexual interactions with a child, either go check yourself into a psych ward or do what I did, see a specialist.

Back in 2012, I actually committed a child sex crime. They went easy on me in the court, and I mean EASY. I was 18, he was 15. We never saw one another unless we were fully clothed, and all we did was talk. Stuff like...

TRIGGER WARNING

"I want to [...] with you"
"I find you sexy.

END TRIGGER WARNING

Turns out though, about the last two or three weeks of talking to him, it wasn't him, it was his dad. The very last thing I sent to him was asking to see his genitals. His profile went immediately offline and two weeks later I had State Troopers in my home to get my computer to do a forensic analysis on.

I had a damn good attorney, and I had an understanding district attorney. I was put on ARD probation for 18 months, which I broke the rules of and was thrown back into court, which I was then again given the same punishment (or a gift, from my point of view), except for three months.

The point I'm trying to make is, I know what it's like. It's horrifying being attracted to kids. It's even more horrifying knowing that if you take action on these urges, you're in a LOT of legal trouble. Never look up child porn, never touch a kid or talk to one sexually. I know, it was hard for me back then too, but seeing the specialist (and having the living $#%^ scared out of me from the criminal charges) helped me. I can't speak for you, but my insurance paid for the specialist. I had an evaluation done that would have originally been $1500, I paid nothing. The appointments for the specialist generally cost over $300, I paid a small co-pay each visit.

It's worth it. If it gets to that length, go. I had to travel an hour one way to see him, but it helped. Believe me, you'd rather spend some money on a specialist and maybe gas than a few years in state prison and be a registered sex offender for a few decades.

Hope this helps.

:( Hugs for both of you. Especially you Tyler. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Yoruichi, feel free to contact me if you like. I'm a young paedophile with similar fantasies. I understand what you're going through.

Tyler77 wrote:Hi, welcome to the forums.

Being attracted to children isn't a bad thing. Now, I know that sounds crazy, but it's not. What's bad is acting out those thoughts on a child. There isn't a thing on this planet that someone isn't sexually attracted to. If you're simply just thinking of these scenarios and masturbating to them, then that's fine. I'm friends with two people that do that. They're never touched a child or looked at child porn or anything along those lines, they just use their imagination in the privacy of their own home.

If it does get to the point where the thoughts and the urges get to the point where you have serious plans or intentions to look at child porn or molest/rape/have sexual interactions with a child, either go check yourself into a psych ward or do what I did, see a specialist.

Back in 2012, I actually committed a child sex crime. They went easy on me in the court, and I mean EASY. I was 18, he was 15. We never saw one another unless we were fully clothed, and all we did was talk. Stuff like...

TRIGGER WARNING

"I want to [...] with you"
"I find you sexy.

END TRIGGER WARNING

Turns out though, about the last two or three weeks of talking to him, it wasn't him, it was his dad. The very last thing I sent to him was asking to see his genitals. His profile went immediately offline and two weeks later I had State Troopers in my home to get my computer to do a forensic analysis on.

I had a damn good attorney, and I had an understanding district attorney. I was put on ARD probation for 18 months, which I broke the rules of and was thrown back into court, which I was then again given the same punishment (or a gift, from my point of view), except for three months.

The point I'm trying to make is, I know what it's like. It's horrifying being attracted to kids. It's even more horrifying knowing that if you take action on these urges, you're in a LOT of legal trouble. Never look up child porn, never touch a kid or talk to one sexually. I know, it was hard for me back then too, but seeing the specialist (and having the living $#%^ scared out of me from the criminal charges) helped me. I can't speak for you, but my insurance paid for the specialist. I had an evaluation done that would have originally been $1500, I paid nothing. The appointments for the specialist generally cost over $300, I paid a small co-pay each visit.

It's worth it. If it gets to that length, go. I had to travel an hour one way to see him, but it helped. Believe me, you'd rather spend some money on a specialist and maybe gas than a few years in state prison and be a registered sex offender for a few decades.

Hope this helps.

15 yr olds are not "kids" - not psychically, not psychologically. No area of science defines 15 yr olds as kids. History did not define 15 yr olds as "kids". Religion does not define 15 yr olds as "kids". And, by virtue of where she placed puberty, deliberately, neither does mother nature. In many many countries you would be free to bugger 14 yr olds (where consensual) yet break no law.

How can it be true that the 15 yr old who willingly engages in sex in the US or UK has been 'abused' and 'traumatized' yet the 15 yr old who willingly engages in sex in Brazil, Greece, Italy, Germany, China, The Netherlands and so on has not been????

You should not accept this bull***t.

^ya I agree with that

probably why the courts went easy on you too...they probably had a hard time believing their own bull lol

Lololol. I agree with you completely James. This has often been something I have wondered as well. Grrrrrrr. It makes no sense! I'm still waiting for someone to explain that one to me.

Okay, so you are sexually attracted to prepubescent little children, so moving away from the age of consent argument for a moment ...

The first thing you need to do is stop or avoid punishing yourself for it. It's nothing that you chose.

The second thing you need to do is to remember that sexual contact with children causes harm. Even the pro-contacts agree on this matter; that in our current social structure, if you engage sexually with a child, that child will come to harm.

The third thing you need to do is to take off your rose-colored glasses about children and stop lofting them beyond human. Some children are angelic; but some children are brats and some children are manipulative little bastards. In the end, they are human. Because they are human, the span the spectrum of human conditions. Lofting others onto pedestals is as much objectification of our fellow human beings as any other form of denying them their humanity; and when you objectify a fellow human being, you have taken your first step to criminal behavior.

The fourth thing you need to do; and this is, for most of us, the hardest; is taking a "fearless moral inventory" of yourself and with brutal self-honesty, ask yourself: "Am I likely to act out sexually with a child?" IN other words: Do you find yourself making plans? Do you go out of your way to be around children? If one of these "angelic little children" hopped up on you and started giving you a lap dance, what would you do next? There are plentiful signs, found easily on the internet, on the topic f identifying prowling offenders: Do you exhibit these behaviors? Being honest with oneself can be excruciatingly difficult; but it seems to me that you have taken a huge step towards this and I applaud you. An honest answer to this question: "Am I likely to act out?" will tell you what you need to do next; and I seriously doubt that it is necessary to lock yourself into a psych ward to resolve the issue and live safely in society.

It's rare that I find myself in unqualified agreement with RecoveringSO, but I think he's got an excellent post here.

Tyler77 wrote:Hi, welcome to the forums.

Being attracted to children isn't a bad thing. Now, I know that sounds crazy, but it's not. What's bad is acting out those thoughts on a child. There isn't a thing on this planet that someone isn't sexually attracted to. If you're simply just thinking of these scenarios and masturbating to them, then that's fine. I'm friends with two people that do that. They're never touched a child or looked at child porn or anything along those lines, they just use their imagination in the privacy of their own home.

If it does get to the point where the thoughts and the urges get to the point where you have serious plans or intentions to look at child porn or molest/rape/have sexual interactions with a child, either go check yourself into a psych ward or do what I did, see a specialist.

Back in 2012, I actually committed a child sex crime. They went easy on me in the court, and I mean EASY. I was 18, he was 15. We never saw one another unless we were fully clothed, and all we did was talk. Stuff like...

TRIGGER WARNING

"I want to [...] with you"
"I find you sexy.

END TRIGGER WARNING

Turns out though, about the last two or three weeks of talking to him, it wasn't him, it was his dad. The very last thing I sent to him was asking to see his genitals. His profile went immediately offline and two weeks later I had State Troopers in my home to get my computer to do a forensic analysis on.

I had a damn good attorney, and I had an understanding district attorney. I was put on ARD probation for 18 months, which I broke the rules of and was thrown back into court, which I was then again given the same punishment (or a gift, from my point of view), except for three months.

The point I'm trying to make is, I know what it's like. It's horrifying being attracted to kids. It's even more horrifying knowing that if you take action on these urges, you're in a LOT of legal trouble. Never look up child porn, never touch a kid or talk to one sexually. I know, it was hard for me back then too, but seeing the specialist (and having the living $#%^ scared out of me from the criminal charges) helped me. I can't speak for you, but my insurance paid for the specialist. I had an evaluation done that would have originally been $1500, I paid nothing. The appointments for the specialist generally cost over $300, I paid a small co-pay each visit.

It's worth it. If it gets to that length, go. I had to travel an hour one way to see him, but it helped. Believe me, you'd rather spend some money on a specialist and maybe gas than a few years in state prison and be a registered sex offender for a few decades.

Hope this helps.

Yeah, that's pretty absurd. Because of a 3 year age gap too. Sorry you had to deal with that.