Did you already have a paraphilia as a child?

The beginnings of my masochistic/humiliation fetish started early. My mother says I enjoyed watching comedy shows in which people threw pies in each other's faces, she says that was my favorite thing in the world, I must have been as young as 5 or 6. This makes me suspect that even at that age I was becoming fascinated with humiliation. A "pie in the face" is an act of degradation.

At age 8 my humiliation fetish was provided with intense new triggers, I had a young attractive female teacher who wore attractive dresses and skirts and she was always showing her frilly white slip in class when she would cross her legs to talk to the students who were sitting in the floor. I'd be sitting in the floor in front of her and notice that her slip was showing, I knew that slips were a form of underwear so it shocked and excited me that this teacher was showing her underwear to the class everyday. One day a new idea popped into my head, I wanted to share in the experience of exposing myself too so I unzipped and unbuttoned my pants and let my pants slide down so that I was allowing everyone to see my underwear. I grew up with a very strict mother who was always making the point that a person should never allow themselves to be embarrassed or humiliated in public. Therefore, this freedom of exposing myself and essentially humiliating myself felt wonderful because it was the exact opposite of what my mother had taught me to believe.

As a teenager I was bullied by stronger boys and that in itself eventually turned into a humiliation fetish as I turned an adult. But those early memories of being fascinated by humiliation tell me that I've had this paraphilia since at least 5 years old.

Since I was a small girl I notice I like to see people being humiliated.. When I was about 7 I fantasize about rape a lot. All throughout my teenage years and now at 18. I know it's extreme to think about rape in that way but I was really young.

I know that a child cant technically be a pedophile but I did have a fascination with little girls since I was very young. There were these two girls that I knew who were both 4 years old. I was 9 at the time. and I would think about them a lot. I remember trying to decide which one was cuter.
I also had an unhealthy obsession with a certain part of the female body since I was 4. I was disappointed when I found out that adult females didn't look how I thought they would. I thought they would look the same as a prepubescent girl. But I guess none of that is really that weird since I was also a child.

As for my other paraphilia. I have some kind of watersports fetish that I had since I was 7. I remember really wanting to wet myself but I was always to chicken to try it.

I've also always liked the idea of being humiliated or seeing another boy being humiliated by a girl. as I got older those thoughts got a lot more disturbing, so I try not to entertain them.

I think I was kind of a perverted kid

Zebramouse wrote:I know that a child cant technically be a pedophile but I did have a fascination with little girls since I was very young. There were these two girls that I knew who were both 4 years old. I was 9 at the time. and I would think about them a lot. I remember trying to decide which one was cuter.
I also had an unhealthy obsession with a certain part of the female body since I was 4. I was disappointed when I found out that adult females didn't look how I thought they would. I thought they would look the same as a prepubescent girl. But I guess none of that is really that weird since I was also a child.

As for my other paraphilia. I have some kind of watersports fetish that I had since I was 7. I remember really wanting to wet myself but I was always to chicken to try it.

I've also always liked the idea of being humiliated or seeing another boy being humiliated by a girl. as I got older those thoughts got a lot more disturbing, so I try not to entertain them.

I think I was kind of a perverted kid

Since I was like 6, I had a thing for making people be unsure if I was a boy or girl xD lol. And I also liked the idea (and still do) of a boy being stuck upside down in chocolate, naked >.< -.-. So to sum it up, I liked to crossdress but leave it neutral, androgynous really and liked seeing other boys naked stuck in chocolate (though that never happened, I wish it would)

With somr paraphiles that might be harder to distinguish. Personally I'm going to say yes. But, for myself, as many others, I am pedo/ephebo phile who also likes adults. So apart from wrinkly old people I have no distinction, and as a child it's considered normal, it's not until you get to late teens/twenties that it becomes abnormal to like young/pre teens. And thus is hard to establish whether it was a paraphile right from the off or not

I believe everything we are as adults formed or was learned when children. Insofar as who we're attracted to, or what identifies us that's all learned behaviour. I don't subscribe to genetics determining who we're attracted to. We might desire those with complimentary or compatible genes (as latest studies suggest,) but no gene is going to short-circuit free will/choice and decide who we go to bed with.

How much free will is involved in attraction though, Captain?

People with deviant sexualities have lived lives of anguish, because they can't change who they're attracted to. No free will about it.

I agree with you that what we learn as children is a very significant factor, perhaps the biggest factor, but genetics definitely plays a part too. Evolution thrives on diversity and throwing up anomalies after all.

I do believe that my paraphilia was formed quite early in my childhood, probably before the age of five. There are a number of things that I can look back on and point to as being the probable origins.

The yard where I played at pre-school backed onto a graveyard. I remember being fascinated by the fact that there were people laying beneath those stones. The other children were completely uninterested, but I gave those people a lot of thought, and found it sad that their families had buried and left them.

I had no idea that corpses decompose, and I wondered why people didn't keep their loved ones.

At around five or six years old, I was obsessed with dinosaurs, and the concept of finding bones in the ground. My father took me to a place to see a collection of dinosaur bones. I can't remember what the place was, only that it wasn't open to the public, and we were quite privileged to be there. The dinosaur bones were amazing, but what really excited me was the human remains in this collection, which included some complete specimens that had been used in medical universities.

My mother went potty when we got back and I told her about it. She was furious with the old man for exposing me to such creepy things, and I felt sorry for those dead people for her attitude towards them.

That's a memory that I've had 'buried' for a long time, and has only recently resurfaced. I never forgot about it completely, but it hasn't been readily recalled for some time, which is surprising seeing as how it's so obviously significant. I'm still joining the dots and with the help of a psychotherapist, gradually understanding more about my mindset at an early age, up to the age of ten when I developed my first necrophile 'love' for a young woman buried in a graveyard across the road from me.

The preserved bodies in that collection were significant because of my young self's disdain at what I saw as discarding the dead. If they could be preserved so well, why couldn't all dead people? Why do we throw away people we've loved like broken toys? It seemed such a sad and callous waste to my young mind.

HesDeltanCaptain
but no gene is going to short-circuit free will/choice and decide who we go to bed with.

So gays 'choose' to be gay then?
Genes and upbringing determine our behaviour as adults.
There is no such thing as choice.

The whole 'is homosexuality genetic' question assumes sexual orientations are objective realities. I don't believe they are. They're simply terms we invented to describe who has sex with whom. But the reality is people simply have sex. Genetics (assuming we'd known of them back then) wouldn't have been wondered about back before the word homosexuality was coined. It was all mere preference and who knows why some prefer blondes, some prefer men/women, some prefer tall or short. Prior to any word used to describe same-sex sex, we weren't factionalizing love. People just fell in love with whoever and that was that. Not until most religions promising a paradisical afterlife, and same-sex sex threatened it was it a thing. But the ancient Greeks and Romans and others didn't care who was having sex with whom, they were just doing it.

Attraction is learned. And our peers play a big role as well. Our society is decidely hetero-centric. But I don't think that's why the majority is always heterosexual. I think it's simply biology in action. To procreate you need a man and a woman (for now, an interesting "Through the Wormhole" episode talked about the possibility of homosexual procreation in the not-too-distant future.) And since we're biologically set up to procreate there's going to be a big biological factor steering us towards heterosexuality. But since sex isn't just for procreation (as orgasms and climaxes attest I think) some will always disregard biology in order to have sex with who they're attracted to. The real question then becomes is homosexual attraction different than heterosexual? Sinc eheterosexual attraction is about procreation on the biological level, but homosexuals can't, shouldn't their attraction be about other things? More physical or something, whereas heterosexual's key in on genetic cues subconsciously so their offspring are optimal. This isn't to say one's good, one's bad. I'm bisexual myself and perfectly ok about it. I'm talking about it more in the human-animal sense. Will leave politics to politicians.