Disturbing dream, pedophilia *WARNING: POSSIBLE TRIGGER*

I encourage to stop reading if you have been abused as a child or if you have poor self-control.
This dream I had last night was so disturbing I can't get it off of my head now.
It totally looked like a movie, but the most disturbing, sick movie you could ever watch. Nothing compares to it, really.

The dream started with a normal scene of a life in an elementary school: kids in their uniform, janitors, parents, a lot of movement in the school.
Slowly, every adult started to go away - this is where the weird part of the dream begins - and apparently only some janitors remained, as kids slept in the school in what looked like dorms. Very weird, anyway.
The dream so far was inpersonal, I mean, there was no "me", no particular character, nothing. The dream indeed alternates third-person perspective and first-person perspective.

Then, attention moved on to a scene where a man was sitting, face down, legs spread, apparently dead, on a seat, in a room with many seats (maybe it was a small school theatre?). That man, apparently dead, turned out to be me in that moment, as I could see through his eyes and feel his emotions (but he didn't look like me, and was much older, like 30-35, while I'm just 20. So, let's refer to him as "me". So, I was there, without moving, scared because I could feel a presence in the room, a man. Another man was sitting on the seat behind mine, he probably was a school janitor. That "presence" killed the janitor, and I was scared that he could kill me too, so I kept pretending I was dead. He stopped, stared at me, then did nothing, and walked away.

Another scene: I walked away, and met the killer, behind a door which was half covered, half not, so I could only see his face. The place now started to be weird, it didn't even look like a school.
I don't know why, how, but I told the killer that I was "a pedophile too" (so I knew he was a pedophile wanting to take control of the school? who knows, confusing part of the dream) and he smiled at me. We were becoming friends.

There were other bad guys in the school, other two I think, all pedophiles. So now the dream showed a bunch of bad (I should say child molesters better, because their intent was to rape children) child molesters, with weapons, taking control of the school. Very confusing, I can't remember everything.

Now it didn't look much as a first-person dream, I don't know, it all was very blurred and confusing, or I just can't remember.

I remember a scene where this group of child molesters entered a room with little girls sleeping in their beds, talked to them, pretended to be janitors or teachers, and then made them get into a room where the child molesters started to rape them - but the rape scene, well, I couldn't see it clearly, or maybe I just removed some parts and can't remember.

I would appreciate your help, trying to understand this very weird, messed up and disturbing dream, trying to put the pieces together and figure out what it was that I dreamed of.

If this helps, yes, in reality I'm a real pedophile / hebephile (but not child molester - I'd never molest a little girl and this is why the dream just looked so disturbing to me), non-exclusive (I like adult girls too but not as much as little girls), age range goes from 10 to 15, more or less, even though I prefer ages 13-15, I mean, that's the age range I mostly feel attracted to, but I could easily be attracted to a younger girl, like 11 year-old or maybe 10, it depends on the looks, really.
And I am suffering these days, because of my condition which is getting worse and worse, and I desperately feel the need to look at little girls and maybe caress them, so yes, I feel like I'm starting to lose control and I'm extremely afraid of it. And no, I don't want to talk to anyone about this, you understand why....

Your not alone bro. I also have dreams of making love to children. In my dream its different than what happens in reality. In my dream, whenever I have sex with little girls ages 7-13, they all enjoy it and there was no negative effects. the girls just keep wanting more and more. girl after girl after girl. I am a Pedophile and yes I also worry about acting the urges out in the future. I masturbate to keep the urges on the low level. I researched today online about people who were molested and today I came across a website where this girl was molested at age 3 by a man and she experienced no negative effects. I read the comments and there was another girl who was molested at age 8 I think by her uncle and she also experienced no negative effects. I guess not every girl experiences negative effects. I never acted on my urges by the way so im good so far.

Taulant14 wrote:Your not alone bro. I also have dreams of making love to children. In my dream its different than what happens in reality. In my dream, whenever I have sex with little girls ages 7-13, they all enjoy it and there was no negative effects. the girls just keep wanting more and more. girl after girl after girl. I am a Pedophile and yes I also worry about acting the urges out in the future. I masturbate to keep the urges on the low level. I researched today online about people who were molested and today I came across a website where this girl was molested at age 3 by a man and she experienced no negative effects. I read the comments and there was another girl who was molested at age 8 I think by her uncle and she also experienced no negative effects. I guess not every girl experiences negative effects. I never acted on my urges by the way so im good so far.

I find it hard these days to keep my urges low, I go out and see attractive young girls like 11, 12, 13 years old and I kinda look at them and everytime it happens that they look back at me for some reason, I feel that intense desire to go there and talk to them and get intimate with them, but then I snap back to reality, I think to myself that I'm 20, meaning I'm a young adult now and I should be responsible and control myself....

We all have sexy dreams that fulfill a need within us, only the most confused or selfish experience such dreams and think about making them reality, I have frequently had the most xxx rated dreams involving little girls that would make me blush in real life, but I adore those dreams, nobody gets hurt and nobody knows and best of all my dream fantasies are utterly convincing to myself, I wake up and am incredibly happy for a few hours and would never think of going out to try and make it real.

As long as you can distinguish between reality and the dreams then you will do just fine

PNL2 wrote:We all have sexy dreams that fulfill a need within us, only the most confused or selfish experience such dreams and think about making them reality, I have frequently had the most xxx rated dreams involving little girls that would make me blush in real life, but I adore those dreams, nobody gets hurt and nobody knows and best of all my dream fantasies are utterly convincing to myself, I wake up and am incredibly happy for a few hours and would never think of going out to try and make it real.

As long as you can distinguish between reality and the dreams then you will do just fine

i tried getting some in a lucid dream but there was people around and it turned into a monkey on a branch pooing and eating bananas

:0

PNL2 wrote:We all have sexy dreams that fulfill a need within us, only the most confused or selfish experience such dreams and think about making them reality, I have frequently had the most xxx rated dreams involving little girls that would make me blush in real life, but I adore those dreams, nobody gets hurt and nobody knows and best of all my dream fantasies are utterly convincing to myself, I wake up and am incredibly happy for a few hours and would never think of going out to try and make it real.

As long as you can distinguish between reality and the dreams then you will do just fine

how can I have those dreams too? Lol