I give up...

I'm sick of my mind. I just can't overcome this $#%^! My passion in life was always music! I was obsessed with it, now I just don't feel it at all. My mind is telling me the musics bad, and if it's well known its bad? It's making me kina anxious. I just want to enjoy music with no pre-conceptions. I feel like I'm living in a fantasy. Seriously, I'd a friends knows the music I enjoy I get pissed, and often stop listening to that music, it's mad. I want to just enjoy it before I'm gone. How do I get over this $#%^?

Is it all music you don't 'feel'? I overplay music I enjoy (I play the same tracks continuously) and I find I get a little bored after a while - or end up over-analysing them - and have to stop. Usually a few weeks later I've built up enthusiasm again. It's all about peaks and troughs.

Are you on meds for OCD? Sounds like you need to develop other interests as well as music. Hard to think of the future but it is on the horizon. Not sure what you are experiencing is OCD. Your thoughts are reactive to circumstance rather than random. You get angry at your friend liking the same music as you isn't really OCD.
Unfortunately you are at the age when you start to question whether you have the credentials to go further in music. It takes real passion and talent to deal with all the set backs. You really have to do lots and lots of work before any success is likely.