Problem With My Condition

I'm so god damn tired of this #######5 ass condition I'm having. I'm tired of it all. Every time I just wanna rest but it keeps on coming.

Now I'm suffering a different problem, I read a post today about a sex offender p*do who told his story of how he came to be p*do. He simply found boys 'cute' and considered their faces 'pure', all those words make me feel like I wanna vomit.

The worst part is when he found out he was a pedo. He found it he was a pedo when he saw some kid in class that looked 'cute'. I'm kinda horrified.

The reason why I'm scared is simply, because that once happened to me, I sat in class with a child, I was like 'Aww, he's gonna be my classmate' but then my brain made me feel like a pedo and I got into a downward spiral. Now I felt like a p*do and so on.

I'm really scared because I find boys faces 'Cute' but I don't wanna even have sex with any of them. I'm so scared, I feel guilty saying 'cute', holy crap, am I a pedo? I'm sooooo tired of this crap!