Am I creepy or is this POCD?

Content warning: It's NSFW because it talks about disturbing intrusive thoughts

I saw a picture today of a drawing of a girl that I initially thought was attractive, of a character I was unfamiliar with. On second glance, the post that I saw the drawing on gave some information that made me think that it was possible that she could have been a minor. And it was awful, cause I still felt like maybe I was still attracted to the picture even though she could be a minor. Then I looked up the character and found that she really was only 17, which is too young for me because I'm 21. After I found out her age I didn't really find her that attractive anymore, because now I could only see her as a kid after I found out for certain that she was supposed to be a minor. But I am still worried. I initially only thought her legs were attractive when I didn't know she was a minor, and after I found out she was I don't really view them the same way but it is true that I would find that part of her attractive if she was an adult. So I am worried that I actually am still slightly sexually attracted to her and I can't stand the thought of having any sexual feelings, no matter how little, for a person I know is a minor. And there is the fact that I found her attractive at all. What if it was really obvious from the picture that she was supposed to be a kid?
The character's name is Halo and the picture I was saw was of the original one, I think. There is only one picture of her that I am worried about being attracted to - the rest don't cause me much worry because they weren't the first ones that I saw, I think. Like, I am getting compulsions to check the picture over and over to see if I am attracted to it and sometimes I feel something in my groin but it feels less like attraction and more anxious, which I think is just caused by POCD anxiety. But I'm worried that it's not. I am also getting bad intrusive thoughts about her, like involving me inappropriately touching her legs or rear. My intrusive thoughts have never involved me specifically violating people until yesterday, and now they're involving me still and it's incredibly disturbing. I don't want to touch anyone inappropriately and it just disturbs me, they don't inspire any sexual feeling in me and yet my mind keeps telling me this is what I really want or that I like it. And the more I think about it, the more I am afraid that I really do want that, even though at first it was really obvious that it wasn't. I am so confused, annoyed and disturbed. I really don't think I can handle intrusive thoughts about me being a predator all the time, and I hope this isn't a reoccurring direction they are going in.

The reason why those thoughts started is partially because I heard that therapy for POCD included exposure. And one of the final steps was hugging a child. So sometimes when I start worrying about being attracted to characters that are minors (and it's usually fictional characters that I liked beforehand) I imagine me doing a small interaction with them that is completely non-sexual. Like me patting them on the head or hugging them. I don't do it often, very seldom.

(Edit: I should probably mention that the reason I don't do it often is most of the time it happens with non-human characters who are like, funny animal people who are also minors, or small children. They're also usually characters that I'm familiar with or fond of. So maybe the reason why it went wrong here was because this character was a human teenager and I just learned of her, like, today.)

It usually helps me remind myself how I actually think of them; Not in a sexual way, but that I only find them adorable in a non-creepy way. So I imagined me hugging Halo, but then I had an intrusive thought of me slapping her on her rear out of nowhere and it happened so fast that it took me by surprise. I was shocked that I had that thought and I couldn't understand why it had happened. I keep revisiting the thought because I'm like, I worry 'what if this is proof that I do have sexual feelings for her' and now I've worried so much about it I'm like getting groinal responses and I worry that means I'm attracted to the idea even though initially I didn't get any groinal responses at all or anything. And now I think it is weird that I even thought of hugging her at all, even if it wasn't supposed to be sexual or anything, like maybe I am just weird and creepy? Now I feel really awful.
Also by now the idea of me ever liking that intrusive thought has already faded, but I keep worrying that sometimes when I worry that I like something, maybe I DO really like it, temporarily and the thought of that drives me crazy and makes me upset.


The good thing about the intrusive thoughts is that I can easily distract myself from them from shaking my head. The bad news is that this is embarrassing to do in public, but so is abruptly having a noticeably sour look on my face every time I get an awful intrusive thought. Also I think it's a compulsion.

But I always get crazy worries like these and I never get any certain answers on them so in the end I'm forced to stop thinking about them in order to not go insane and then if I see the thing that spiked my worry in the first place, I rarely ever worry about it again and I usually think something like, "what was I ever worried about before?" But it's always something else and then I'll worry about something else until it is forgotten, and it's a vicious cycle. I just want to stop thinking about this now.

Also uh this is really unrelated but

I don't chastise anyone for having their OCD focus on the idea of being gay or trans. I'm going to preface this but saying it's not like bigoted or anything to like not want to be gay when your sexuality is something else, because lots of gay people don't want to be straight. I mean, if your sexuality is gay you don't want to be attracted to an unlike gender and the opposite is true for straight people. And if your trans you don't want to be your AGAB, and cis people don't want their gender to be different from their AGAB. I'm not saying that this obsession is inherently bigoted or anything, but I feel a lot of the time people with these obsessions tend to use homophobic or transphobic language and get a pass on it.

I'll see people using outdated terms for being gay or trans that are considered offensive, or saying offensive things and nobody really mentions anything about how that's wrong. I get that you don't want to be gay or trans, but you can still view gay or trans people as people without talking about them as if they're this scary or disgusting other. You don't have to talk about them with offensive, dehumanizing language. I never see gay people worried about being straight or trans people worried about being cis talking about straight or cis people like this, so it's time for some people to straighten up. I know some people will just say they're ignorant or uninformed but like, the moment you try to inform most of these people about why how they talk about LGBT people is wrong they'll just argue with you and justify it. It's what happens 99% of the time with people who talk about LGBT people like that.

Okay, that was completely unrelated. I probably shouldn't be getting on the soap box when I have creepy weird intrusive thoughts all the time, but I'm tired of seeing posts on here or basically anywhere else wrt where no one knows how to talk about gay and particularly trans people normally.