Hocd i think , please help me find out.

Hello so I am a 16 years old boy amd all my life i was attracted to girls , i never questioned my sexuality until now , one night i was aroused by anything and i saw a picture of a guy and i was aroused for the first time in my life by a boy and from then i have an obssesion to test myself and to reassure , i have many girlfriends , i am more close to girls and i like their company more , i like to talk to guys about gym , games etc but with girls I like to cuddle and to get turned on , i have a girlfriend and when i hug her i get an erection , i gave her a cunnilingus and i loved it , i love lesbian porn , vaginas are a big turn on for me , i watched 20 minutes of gay porn the first 10 were scary bit after 10 minutes i was calm but no reaction from my penis to it , at lesbian porn i get erection and i get turned on , i need the proof that i am straighr 24/24 , i look at guys to see if I am aroused but i only have fear and a "spike" i think this is how its called and after it I have a groinal response , weird that i have it only when i have a spike , anyway , am i gay or i have HOCD ? When i was younger i had thoughts about killing my family and 6 months ago I was scared that i have sifillis because i had a infectiom to my penis and i was sure it was sifillis but it was a simple infection and i searched so much to reassure that i don't have sifillis , it was horrible , i just don't understand the groinal response and i have intrusive gay thoughts and i feel forced to be gay , please can somebody calm me down ?

You are obviously NOT gay. Really nothing you typed makes me think you're gay. I find it weird that ocd can mess up brains so badly because look at what you typed, you're a typical heterosexual boy. I'm gay and I've never been turned on by lesbian porn or vaginas. I think you have a typical case of hocd. Hope this calms you down. You have a history of ocd (I officially have ocd and I also used to worry extremely about diseases etc) so I'm almost 100% sure you are not gay. I say almost because I can't even say I'm male for 100% while I'm a guy obviously but my point is I just almost never use the full 100% in case you would be worrying over me saying "almost

Fwiw, the type of porn you watch isn't relevant to your orientation. Even if you didn't like lesbian porn it doesn't make you gay.

Maybe i have all these gay thoughts because of all the gay porn that i watch to reassure ? I don't want these thoughts anymore , even if i fantasize about girls my brain turns the vagina into a penis and everything goes f****d up, i have to stop fantasizing , i didn't have such thoughts before , i should stop watching porn ? Could that stop my thoughts?

Straight people have been known to start looking at gay porn....

I think checking is a bad idea, because a person might get a porn taste for what they're checking with- but it still doesn't mean that that's something someone would want to do IRL. I don't think it's that easily changed, what a guy is.