Sensorimotor (breathing) OCD returns

Hello, I first realised that I have Sensorimotor OCD was about 9 months ago, I was really confused, scared and derpessed. It was mostly the breathing type SOCD. In time somehow it went away, well not really, I was just not bothered by it so much anymore, and I could live a somewhat normal life. Only doctor I visited was pshyhologist, but it was only once, mostly because of how much money a proper treatment could cost.
It was few days ago when "snap", just like that the fears were back on and I knew that I'm f***ed. I've been heavily drinking for a couple of days prior, and I think hangover really helped this thing to come back. Also some emotional trauma like break-up, being fired from my job and just having an overall existential crysis.
What I fear now is that once I beat it, it was alright and I never thought that this would return, at least not in such a critical form. This has once again taken all over my life, I can't think of anything else, and enjoy anything else. Working is really difficult also, because I'm a designer, my creativity is a way that I make money, but now I can't be productive in that field at all...
I last posted here when I last had this, about 9 months ago, and recieved great support, now I think I just want to open up the topic again, maybe there's anyone else who is dealing with this particular type of OCD, has beaten it, or is/has experienced symptoms returning after a while of absence.
Thank you!

Dear edgpavl:

Last time you thought it will last for the rest of your life, if I remember correctly, but then, you got a break. It can happen again. My different OCD focuses came and went and changed, so yours will change as well. Try to relax best you can, relax into it. Sort of ACCEPT it best you can, the obsession, the suffering. Don't fight it. If this is your life, let it be.

Accept it, don't resist, and you will see, it will get better.
atina