I can't force the thoughts away anymore

My heterosexual OCD is getting worse. What if I'm just forcing myself to say "I'm still a lesbian?" I am so afraid, I can't be straight. I don't want to be with men. I want my attraction to women to come back. I can't stop checking and checking and checking and checking and today it even felt weird to call myself gay even though I know deep down I'm still a lesbian. It's starting to interfere with my life more and more. I can't even tell if my relationship with my girlfriend feels right anymore. I am so anxious I want to scream

Dear Caity647:

When you get anxious, the thing to do is to relax: deep breathing, calming music, hot bath, a brisk walk outside- anything like that to calm yourself down. The thing to not do is to think. Thinking is the wrong thing to do when anxious and that is key. Switch from thinking to listening to music, to the sounds of music, or to the feeling of the hot water in the bath. Switch from thinking to sensing.

Think when calm, not when anxious. Do that every time: switch and think when calm.

atina