Am i trans or do I have ocd

First off I'd like to say I know I have some type of ocd. When I was younger I would wash my hands and open doors with my elbows cause I didn't want to get any germs. I also started to obsess about going to he'll because I thought I was a bad person. Then I started thinking I was gay for the longest time even though I always had crushes on girls. Any creeping thought of me thinking a guy was good looking would send me into a anxiety frenzy. I'd start checking if I wanted to kiss them or touch them. Recently I've had anxiety over possibly being transgender. I always liked being a guy but I've had fantasies of being a girl in sexual ways. Being dominated and used. I've watched all types of porn and they arouse me which gets me even more freaked out. I've even had tingling feelings in my body like my chest and thoughts saying that there should be boobs there and my butt should be nice and round so guys can look at me. I'm so freaked out and depressed that I might be transgender and I'm just in denial. Sorry for the long post. I need help

Hi,

I can tell this is all OCD just based on your post alone. If these thoughts disturb you, you know it didn't come from your true self. It's your OCD. I can relate to the panic and fear. That's a false alarm. It's not you, it's your OCD. Try to relabel the thoughts so you don't play its game (looking for answers when no answers need to be found). I know it's tough. I am struggling with OCD and doubting that I have it as well. Let's try and stay strong. We can do it.