Harm OCD is getting worse, it's killing me. Am i evil?

Please answer ASAP i'm going crazy here. So i'm in my teens and 3 months ago i developed harm OCD, the thoughts are mostly of hurting my parents or the people i love and it kills me, the thoughts are horrible and i even get urges to do it even when i know i would neve do it and i'm not capable of it, but i live everyday in constant fear that at any moment i'm going to snap and hurt my parents or anyone for that matter and it scares me to death. But what worries me the most is that now after 3 months my harm ocd seems to be getting worse, the thoughts seem to be getting more evil and horrible than before and now they're based around feelings, for example, the other day this horrible intrusive hought randomly popped into my head: "What would it feel like/be like to stab someone with a knife?" It was so horrible it scared the hell out of me, because of that thought i'm terrified of knives and yesterday the thought of "what would it feel like to strangle someone?" Came to my mind and i'm so scared i feel like a psycho i just want to die for thinking this horrible stuff and i'm so scared i would suddenly do this horrible things out of curiosity, just to see what it feels like. I can't even, i shouldn't even have thought that in the first place, just a killer would think such horrible things, i'm starting to believe its not even OCD and that i'm just a psycopath. I don't want to hurt anyone let alone to know what it feels like to do it, absolutely not, but my mind is scaring the hell out of me! please what should i do? How can i stop thinking about it? Is this feelings thing normal in OCD?

once i was walking in the street in the middle of the night and i saw this guy peeing by the drain, i had this urge to push him in the drain.

often i have urges to set the world on fire.

what helps me with my ocd(though it is different)
acknowlegde the thoughts
i dont associate words as horrible or evil with them. there's a reason they are there. something bad happened to me and the thoughts are the result of that incident.

acknowledge the thoughts and accept them. one thought doesnt define you. if you have a thought of being cameraon diaz's husband it doesnt make you her husband. if you have a thought of being a millionair, it doesnt make you one.

accept the thoughts and let them pass. dont act on it. talk with the thought. dont call it bad names, or try to beat it, or defeat. let it exist like a passing train. its an ugly train, let it approach the station. dont board it. you can board the next train. let this train pass.

talk with the voice even at other times. like when i'm going for walks, i try to have conversations with the voice and rationalize myself. hug the voice. i tell it that i understand you have urges and your needs but i cant do it. i'm really sorry.

try to have healthy habits at other times. like times when the voice isnt there. go for walks or any other exercise. speak with yourself.

when i dont listen to the voice i feel anxiety and it increases, more and more as i dont listen. i let the anxiety rise, it gets too much,but i let it rise and dont act on the thought. then the anxiety reduces. there's an article about anxiety curve on internet. that helped me understand.

i dont distract myself when the voice comes. i listen to it but dont act on it. i dont have to be the voice's slave nor the voice's master. just like i didnt listen to everything my teacher said i dont have to listen to everything the voice says.

accept the voice, dont call it evil, just let it be there.

About ten or eleven i obsessed over harming myself or my pet. When I was about your age I developed harm ocd towards people as well. I'm fifty now and guess what, it never goes completely away but it ought to get better. It comes and goes. Sometimes I have a long time between attacks, then it will plague me for a while, usually when I go to bed. Worried I'll harm whoever is in the house.

I'm a Christian, so sometimes I take the religious approach and blame it on Satan. Sometime I take a more secular approach. Most of the time I ignore the thoughts. A Charismatic evangelist once said it best: Thoughts may come and go, but thoughts that are not put into word or deed are thoughts that die unborn.

These are just idiotic thoughts. Whether you want to say the devil is messing with your head-and remember he's a liar- or you want to take a materialistic approach, really doesn't matter what the source is. It's all the same, i remind myself it's just #######4. I'm not going to get myself all uptight over bullcrap. Once in a while I'll let it get to me enough to take steps to lessen the 'danger' I'm going to kill someone, but most of the time I force myself to do nothing because.... This is bulllllllll crap. I'm not hurting anyone. This is OCD, the same bullcrap that makes me check the upstairs faucet three times before bed, or make me turn around and go back cause that pothole I hit might have been a person. That's all it is. It's particularly distressing cause your mind is fixated on destruction of those closest to you, but you have to put those thoughts in their place by giving them no regard. Like Tired said, that train is an express is just passing thru.

Everything about harm OCD which I've read basically says people with Harm OCD are the LEAST likely to act on these thoughts--because they're not thoughts you want to have. You can't control everything that comes in your brain, like you can't control the songs that come on the radio. So you will have bad thoughts, everyone will. Difference is between you and the people without OCD, they just go, "Huh. That was a crazy messed up thought. I'd never do that. LOL." And they move on. You attach a huge significance to the thoughts and believe they say something about who you are deep down as a person. They do not. Your terror over it proves the thoughts/images are very unwanted. The only thing that has ever helped me was getting on meds after years of resisting any medical help. SSRIs can word wonders. Depression and anxiety can ruin your life if they're severe enough and you don't get them treated. Find a real psychiatrist who knows about OCD, and it can work wonders.