Obsessing

I am having trouble with a girl over the internet. Her name is Melissa, she runs the (Identifying names are not allowed on the forum) youtube account. I have become obsessed with her. I think I am in love. Falling in love with girls has been normal to me. I have fallen in love with many girls in the past. At age 19, I have never had a girlfriend. But, I fall in love with girls alot. I used to fall in love alot more when I was around 13/14 years old. I fell in love with girls over the internet, girls in chat rooms, that I never saw.

My dad left me when I was young, about 8 years old. He was my hero and I loved my dad. Is it possible that I need to fall in love because I dont have my dad anymore? I am loved by my family. My brother and mom do alot for me.

But I still feel a lack of love. Like I need someone.

Has anyone ever heard of something like this?

she does know I exist. I started messaging her about my problems in early 2011 and that summer I originally became obsessed with her. But, I told her and I became less obsessed with her. I messaged her less and started to forget about her and checked on her a little bit. Her saying she fell in love brought back all the feelings I once had and now they are all back and worse than ever. she knows I am obsessed with her and has told me that going to a hospital would be best for me. I want to go because killing myself over her is not the way to go but, i'm afraid to tell anyone in my family about my problems.

Its tricky answering your post because its not quite clear. Do you have a diagnosed OCD? If not you infatuations with girls are probably utterly normal especially at your age.

However if all you can do is obsess over someone and can not bring yourself to ask a girl out or take it any further, then perhaps you have some other issues that need resolving. Could you have a fear of intimacy.

You haven't described your obsessive behaviour so its hard to tell if you are obsessed to a deeper level than most people. Are you bothering other people.

I was obsessed with someone a couple of years ago. It was someone who i had had a relationship with in my past. I spent all my days checking my emails to see if he'd message me. I spent the whole time utterly focussed on our communications. I was also frequently upset and had to call a helpline about twice a day. In the end i realised i needed to escape my computer so i went off on a great cycling journey and this helped break my obsession. There was certainly an element of depression about it and that resolved when my went away as well. If your behaviour is somewhat like this, then you need to go and get therapy.

Someone else around here mentioned attachment disorder. That makes sense to me with what i've been through and it may also be what's going on with you but rest assured that therapy is what you should be doing. As you are so young, you have a chance to resolve this properly before too much of your life passes away. Go see a woman and work hard at resolving this problem. It may take a while. At least one year but maybe more. I'd suggest psychodynamic/psychoanalytic styles of therapy might be helpful.