Ideas to get over thoughts of revenge

There is someone that I want to get revenge on. Not 'make a fool of them' revenge, but true life ruining, never-ending pain revenge. I've had these thoughts for over a year. I want to see this person destroyed.

I have some things I could do now but don't simply because it would be known it was me that did them. I have other things I could do but would have to involve someone else in the plan, and I'm not certain I can trust anyone to follow through with crushing someone so completely. If I knew with certainty I could, this person would already be living in hell.

To be clear, I am not discussing violence in any way. I have no desire to physically harm this person. I simply want them to end up destitute, humiliated in a severe way, and alone.

How do I move past these feelings? How do I stop myself from wanting to obliterate any possibility that this person's life will continue on a content, albeit boring, path? How do I take control of these thoughts?

Any advice is welcome. Thank you

Just try seeing it from their point of view (easier said than done)


Alternatively, try to think about somebody else or try and get into something new/read (but without it being linked to revenge)

Why would you get over them? Revenge is fun

jacknife wrote:Why would you get over them? Revenge is fun

Being unable to act on it, is not fun. Better get rid of it.

Greatem wrote:

jacknife wrote:Why would you get over them? Revenge is fun

Being unable to act on it, is not fun. Better get rid of it.

Exactly.

Hi Awake,

What did they do to you to make you feel such strong feelings of revenge?

What they did isn't the issue. I just want some advice on getting past these revenge thoughts.

The story is too long and drawn out to get into here, but they did something that warrants revenge. Let's leave it at that.

You have to forgive them.

This is the only way to move past the anger and hostile (perhaps hurt) feelings. You are giving them so much power over your emotions by being so angry and vendictive with them. You probably spend more time thinking about the situation then they do. They're just going about their merry way living their life yet you remain angry and affected. Forgiveness is the only way when you can't find other means of closure.

thatwasthen wrote:You have to forgive them.

What?

No

Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.