jokes

Is it hard for Ns to take a joke from the nons? Do you find sarcasm very offensive?
I think my ex N could not often tell whether I was joking or being serious. He would rage if he thought I was serious, because I was clearing insulting him. And he would rage also if thought I was joking, because he thought I was making fun of him.

antonia312 wrote:Is it hard for Ns to take a joke from the nons? Do you find sarcasm very offensive?
I think my ex N could not often tell whether I was joking or being serious. He would rage if he thought I was serious, because I was clearing insulting him. And he would rage also if thought I was joking, because he thought I was making fun of him.

Were you? Give an example.

I don't think they take jokes lightly, ever. I have narcissistic parents and they can NEVER take a joke well. The thing is is that, they think it's OKAY to joke with YOU in a cruel manner. Which ticks me off.

JenFD wrote: they think it's OKAY to joke with YOU in a cruel manner.

What do you mean "with you". As in "complicit"?, or "about you"?

OneLiner wrote:

JenFD wrote: they think it's OKAY to joke with YOU in a cruel manner.

What do you mean "with you". As in "complicit"?, or "about you"?

Just simply anyone. Narcissists can joke with anyone in a cruel manner if they could and see nothing wrong with it. But if you joke with them, they take it up the butt.

JenFD wrote:

OneLiner wrote:

JenFD wrote: they think it's OKAY to joke with YOU in a cruel manner.

What do you mean "with you". As in "complicit"?, or "about you"?

Just simply anyone. Narcissists can joke with anyone in a cruel manner if they could and see nothing wrong with it. But if you joke with them, they take it up the butt.

ok, I guess you mean joking "about people". You may be right, it is a bad habit.

I get jokes analytically, but I don't "get" jokes. The only type of humor I understand is Irony.

I know for a fact that as a young child, I could NOT be jokingly teased, I would flip out. Even if it was from loving family members, and meant joshingly. I was always mortified by the pointing out of my flaws, however minor, however unintended, however kindly put. (I still rage, I just hide it better nowadays. )

JenFD wrote: The thing is is that, they think it's OKAY to joke with YOU in a cruel manner. Which ticks me off.

That's because they assume you understand their POV. Like you can read their mind. (Lack of ego-boundaries.) Which is why they're genuinely shocked when you get upset in return.

undenied wrote:I know for a fact that as a young child, I could NOT be jokingly teased, I would flip out. Even if it was from loving family members, and meant joshingly. I was always mortified by the pointing out of my flaws, however minor, however unintended, however kindly put. (I still rage, I just hide it better nowadays. )

Lack of revaluating mechanism? I have that too.

OneLiner wrote:

undenied wrote:I know for a fact that as a young child, I could NOT be jokingly teased, I would flip out.

Lack of revaluating mechanism? I have that too.

I guess so? No idea honestly. I was so young I didn't think about the "why". It's just always been there. (My poor parents were always mystified.)

I think this is what I meant. But is it because there is no difference between a joke or a real criticism? I guess it also has to do with what your self-image is or what you see as "good"? Say, if you tend to part your hair on the right, and if I say that you probably would hate it if a hairdresser parts your hair on the left, would you get offended?