How to get ex N to value you again

BarrierReef wrote: I always liked to be around to observe my effect after things were done.

Do you mean like if the person showed that they had been hurt in the relationship, or by it ending, that you liked it because it showed that you had an effect as opposed to them being indifferent?

Dulciana wrote:

BarrierReef wrote: I always liked to be around to observe my effect after things were done.

Do you mean like if the person showed that they had been hurt in the relationship, or by it ending, that you liked it because it showed that you had an effect as opposed to them being indifferent?

I mean that it was always interesting and often amusing to see how a woman would react to months of deception and manipulation. Whether she'd come back for more and for how long. How long before she'd date again and what kinds of guys she'd date after me. Those sorts of things.

That is pretty discusting.

I agree. It's not something I'm proud of. Just how I used to operate.

BarrierReef wrote:
I mean that it was always interesting and often amusing to see how a woman would react to months of deception and manipulation. Whether she'd come back for more and for how long. How long before she'd date again and what kinds of guys she'd date after me. Those sorts of things.

thats totaly discusting

foreverhopeful wrote:

BarrierReef wrote:
I mean that it was always interesting and often amusing to see how a woman would react to months of deception and manipulation. Whether she'd come back for more and for how long. How long before she'd date again and what kinds of guys she'd date after me. Those sorts of things.

thats totaly discusting

Ignore that, BarrierReef. Many people here like to bash us and degrade us, projecting their own problems onto random strangers. They, in essence, are the same as us in that they can only see things in black and white (ALL narcissists are evil) without taking into account the fact that every individual is unique. Therefore, their logic is just as flawed as they perceive ours to be.

The difference is that we have a reason for everything we do, and they cannot understand/fathom those reasons, so they are unreasonably aggressive.

I personally thank you for your honest replies to my serious thread.

Thanks Smacster, but it's an understandable reaction. Especially from those who've been on the receiving end of such treatment.

eskandar wrote:

BarrierReef wrote:Thanks Smacster, but it's an understandable reaction. Especially from those who've been on the receiving end of such treatment.

Thanks for understanding and I am glad that you can see that it is not the kind of behavior that somebody should be proud of. It takes a LOT of courage to admit that.

Trust me, I am far from courageous. Just a little less f'ed up than I used to be.

BarrierReef wrote:Thanks Smacster, but it's an understandable reaction. Especially from those who've been on the receiving end of such treatment.

Looks like you've got some empathy going on there, BR.

Dulciana wrote:

BarrierReef wrote:Thanks Smacster, but it's an understandable reaction. Especially from those who've been on the receiving end of such treatment.

Looks like you've got some empathy going on there, BR.

If he has empathy the diagnosis is wrong. If he's coming at it from the logical standpoint, it makes sense.

Dulciana wrote:

BarrierReef wrote:Thanks Smacster, but it's an understandable reaction. Especially from those who've been on the receiving end of such treatment.

Looks like you've got some empathy going on there, BR.

You give me far too much credit. If I did, I would treat my family and friends better than I do. Relationships are easy. I just don't engage in any.