Hello, newly diagnosed and looking for info/advice

Hello, I've recently been diagnosed with NPD, and I'm looking for other people who have been told they have this condition and have made some steps towards changing their life. The internet seems to be full of people who hate "Ns" and I can understand why, but there seems to be very little support for the sufferers (? not sure what word is right here, and I'm not going to call myself an "N"). It has come as a total shock to me to be told this information - something akin to being told I am not human. I am having serious difficulty accepting it and yet at other times I know it's correct and is the root of the many problems I have had in my life and have created in other people's lives. I've read SV's pages but find it difficult to believe that he has NPD: being told by a professional (and recognising yourself) that your life is fake, and worse, that there is no "inner" you to build on is absolutely repulsive and upsetting and causes unbearable conflict; it does not, in my opinion, mean you want to go around shouting about it. And yes I can appreciate the slight hypocrisy in my posting on here about it, but it's a catch-22 situation.

I am torn between walking away from therapy and dismissing the whole thing, (nobody in my life knows about this and in fact would probably describe me as having a lack of confidence, something I also believed myself to be true) and really trying to improve. If it can't be cured: what's the point? Any thoughts?

Erm yeah I'm replying to myself, how fitting. Just spent some more time reading the posts on here and realised there's loads of helpful information already, so please ignore.

vandallous wrote:Hello, I've recently been diagnosed with NPD, and I'm looking for other people who have been told they have this condition and have made some steps towards changing their life. The internet seems to be full of people who hate "Ns" and I can understand why, but there seems to be very little support for the sufferers (? not sure what word is right here, and I'm not going to call myself an "N"). It has come as a total shock to me to be told this information - something akin to being told I am not human. I am having serious difficulty accepting it and yet at other times I know it's correct and is the root of the many problems I have had in my life and have created in other people's lives. I've read SV's pages but find it difficult to believe that he has NPD: being told by a professional (and recognising yourself) that your life is fake, and worse, that there is no "inner" you to build on is absolutely repulsive and upsetting and causes unbearable conflict; it does not, in my opinion, mean you want to go around shouting about it. And yes I can appreciate the slight hypocrisy in my posting on here about it, but it's a catch-22 situation.

I am torn between walking away from therapy and dismissing the whole thing, (nobody in my life knows about this and in fact would probably describe me as having a lack of confidence, something I also believed myself to be true) and really trying to improve. If it can't be cured: what's the point? Any thoughts?

The point is coming is developing the necessary reactions to ignore your disconnects from reality.

Hello vandallous,
My mother is diagnosed NPD. I too won't call people "N's" - I find it distasteful to objectify people, even people who hurt other people.

You will find lots of info here, some helpful and probably some hurtful. There are other sites more assistive and helpful to people with NPD. There is a site where most of the poster have NPD or narcissitic traits and believe that NPD can be improved or alleviated through a variety of means. If you want to PM me, I'd be glad to give you links to several other sites.

In trying to understand my mother, her good - her bad - and her ugly, I've find that pulling from a variety of sources gets you closer to the full picture of NPD.

Lifesong