Your ideal of a "perfect" life

Do you have one or a standard you would like to achieve?

Mine involves a lot of money and beautiful women.

That's really all i want, when it comes down to it.

I also want to be happy, all the time.

And that circles back to the money and women.

After years and years of playing the field, i think eventually i'd like to fall in love.

Then i can die after i fall in love.

Knoxious wrote:Then i can die after i fall in love.

You might want to die after you fall in love.

Have few more interesting relationships, marry someone who'll also be my best friend. Have them do their thing while I'm doing my art thing, travel. Together, alone. Kids. I wanna say '3 of them' but realize it'd be hard to do unless they were triplets or something lol. Pet. Never live like old boring couple, keep ocassional adventures, night life, weird group of friends, meet new people, plenty of alone time, family. Learn more and write more. Have fun during all this. Guess it all depends on choice of a person, should be a wise choice.
That's it.

LachrymosePhoenix wrote:

Knoxious wrote:Then i can die after i fall in love.

You might want to die after you fall in love.

What did i say?

Lemme translate it for you - Abandon hope, all ye who enter here

" Love Me Abandon hope"

now i wonder if that was what that quote meant

I’ve been reflecting on Raven’s question and a little perplexed that I have no idea how to answer.

When I was a kid I had a vision of an idealized life, my focus being on stereotypical signs of success - nice house, nice car, etc.

Now of course I know that those things are just illusions of success and really not terribly meaningful in the grand scheme of things. So what’s my new ideal?

I think two things fit my ideal now...being surrounded by people I care about and who care about me, and having the resources to pursue my passions.

It will be interesting to read back on that a year from now and see if it’s evolved.

My position on this is the same as it was in the aspd forum. We all of us have the lifestyle we choose, often when we don’t, the desire has more to do with the ideal of something than the reality. Beyond that I don’t really believe in ‘perfect’.

It’s like the ideal of owning a dog. It’s all walks on sunny days and cuddles with your furry friend. The reality is more like having to clear up piles of poo every morning, having to go out with them everyday regardless of how much it cold and raining and having to put in with the terrible smells they make when one of them’s found some Fox poo to eat. There are plenty of rescue centres looking for volunteers if people wanted to do things with dogs, even if they didn’t have the money or circumstances to have one of their own.

There’s a man who lives in my local village, used to be a warrant officer in the army. He has an Audi A8 parked on his drive. The open secret around the village is that the car is actually a rental car and that if you go inside his house (which I have been) you find it I’d a very poor state of repair.

I’ve never really been sure if he’s renting this thing on a budget that can’t really support it because he feels he has to or because he gets that much pleasure from driving it and having it on his drive.

Maybe fast cars aren’t meaningful, i can’t say I’ve ever really wanted one. But I can’t help feeling that family, ‘people I love’ and other such answers are just as much stock answers. They’re no less idealised

Quoth wrote:We all of us have the lifestyle we choose, often when we don’t, the desire has more to do with the ideal of something than the reality. Beyond that I don’t really believe in ‘perfect’.

Well, Raven did put the word perfect in quotes, which I took as an invitation to interpret it more liberally.

Quoth wrote:Maybe fast cars aren’t meaningful, i can’t say I’ve ever really wanted one. But I can’t help feeling that family, ‘people I love’ and other such answers are just as much stock answers. They’re no less idealised

Yes, agree, but isn't that the question Raven posed? My interpretation of something "ideal" or "perfect" is the thing you want but don't yet possess. We (humans -- not pwNPD expressly) tend to place a higher value on the things we desire but are out of our grasp. Plus, while "people I love" does indeed sound like a stock answer, I think it takes on a different meaning when you're talking about someone with an attachment disorder.

I've done ok for myself and so acquiring things has not been a challenge. I like my things, don't get me wrong. I'm not trading in that fast car any time soon. But none of it fills the void. Deeper connection in my relationships -- in meaningful way and not just creating an illusion -- is what I want. I've been chasing good feelings all my life to fill an emptiness inside, like an ######6 addict. If I keep it up I'll die alone and they can bury me next to my car.