Somewhat beside myself

For the better part of the last month or so I have been perplexed, more so, annoyed with my disposition. I am to be married in three months time and as each day passes the realization of my new life to be emerges more rapidly. In practice, quite literally, I will have to aquaint myself to the chores and rigor of married life casting upon me a fleeting memory of my once precious independence and leisure time. All of my friends were of the belief that I was not the marrying type. That perhaps I couldn't be bound by the rules that both individuals must adhere to in order for a marriage to grow and last. Despite their review of my character in relation to the culture of married life I am very certain they ( my friends ) assumed to much liberty in their said correlation, or lack-there-of. I love and admire my soon to be wife and I am quite content in all that encompasses her. We rarely argue but when we do we I use
" reflective " responses which might sound rather clinical but it works wonderfully. Here is an example of this type of dialogue.
" Honey, it sounds like you are pissed off at me because I suggested your mother doesn't have a personality disorder because you need a personality to have one of those. I would be upset if you said that about my mother. I understand how you feel. I'm very sorry". By acknowledging her grievence and showing empathy the process of making up is expedited significantly. I also use active listening skills which pin point persons feelings thus validates them merely by verbally showing them why and how they feel. I have found these lessons, from marriage books, quite useful in times when a crisis situation is pending. Anyways, where the hell was I ? Yes, now because my time is short I must live the life I have lived in so many years in 3 months, that is a lot of cramming. My goal is to get it out of my system in the attempt that I will become tired of it thus find it easier to move from an independent man to one who will have a wedding ring on. Aesthetically , don't know how it is spelled and don't care, I do not think men wearing jewelry looks good in the least. I don't want to wear a wedding ring on my finger but she wants me to so i must concede as no amount of active listening and or reflective responses could possibly help my opinion on said matter. She shall have her way. I just don't want my life to become mundane where we sit around a table of food with other married folks discussing rubbish like " How's junior or how is your portfolio". I don't need that kind of chatter in my life. I will never cheat on my wife and I will do everything I can to see to it she is happy with me. I am with her for life. Lately I have become more vain and obsessive about my looks as a result of my disposition. I bought 4 bottles of good cologne, have received 2 facial treatments in less than two month, workout often, cut my hair short, and waxed my eye browse to give them a better shape. I don't know why I am doing these things. Does it have to do with my wedding and feelings relating to it or what? Also I have been feeling quite anxious lately and it has been bothering me. I am beside myself.

And no, I am not gay.

Gay? :/

Anyhow. Perhaps you are placing to much emphasis on what is truly just an aesthetic change. As you may know, I am also getting married in a couple of months. When asked if I am nervous, stress, or concerned, My only response is "Why would I be, it is just a ######6 certificate". Which is true. Prior to being married, I will have held a mutual commitment to the emotional and financial security of mine and my girlfriends relationship, with a going concern for said commitment. After marriage, the situation will be much the same, with a slightly different (and advantageous) tax status, visa eligibility, and a cheap certificate. Seriously, most 6month tafe certificates cost more than this.

The point is, unless you were planning on leaving her (In which case the scenario is somewhat different), there is no meaningful difference between being married, and being unmarried. Nothing has to change. Nothing is mandated (except by society, but ###$ society).

Hi Tinkerbell- I know what April 19th is. It's your birthday!!