Trouble being able to feel empathy

by **Bigbird98** » Fri May 31, 2013 8:30 pm

I have empathy problems too, but unlike you, I have never been able to really feel it and care about others. Others misfortunes mean very little to me unless I'm affected by it. One advantage though to having this lack of empathy is that I am a logical thinker so I tend to make rational decisions. I can't help it. If I can't feel it, I can't feel it.

Sarah007 wrote:I have been "faking it" for quite some time now. Faking how I think I should act in a given situation has not helped foster love, attachment or empathy. Its just exhausting.

I dread my friends leaving not because I empathize with them exactly, but because if they go away I WILL BE LONELY. My anxiety is based on selfish motives.

i have a problem very similar to this. i know how hard it is to fake emotional responses so that other people don't notice anything wrong with you because i have to do the exact same thing. but i keep faking it because im scared of what would happen if anyone found out. im scared of psychiatrists/therapists so i never try and get help. the only thing different about
my problem is that i have homocidal thoughts/desires. i don't know how to help, but you aren't alone.

by **Ikachan** » Thu Jun 20, 2013 4:57 pm

stephani86 wrote:@Sarah007 I came across your post while searching for answers to this very same question! I feel reluctant to have found someone else who feels exactly the way I do. I also want you to know that none of the responses to your question are fulfilling to me either. This has nothing to do with media or anything else, its deeper than that. Whatever it is, I need to know. I recently went to therapy where I was told that the reason I have a hard time feeling empathy is because I do not feel for myself. Since I WANT to feel empathy is a good sign that there is hope for you and I. We have emotion and feelings, therfore our problem should be fixable.

If someone is sad about something, I feel nothing for them and I do not understand why. It makes me feel like a horrible person. I want to feel sad for them and empathize with them, but I just feel cold, like suck it up and get over it. But when its me, I want EVERYONE to feel sad for me. I am lonely in my life, I have a hard time making friends because I am a "bitch". I think I have just settled with that thought but it has gotten to a point where I dont want to be this person anymore and I want to be better.

I want to have a more fulfilling life and not masked with this hard surface to protect myself from pain. I have a hard time trusting people, I do not like liars, I dont even know who I AM. When I really look at myself, I am a selfish, fake person. The only friends I have are family. I just dont want to put the effort into keeping friends, it =feels like WORK to me. Talking on the phone is not something I enjoy doing.

If you have found some help since your post, I really hope that you will share.

i feel the exact same way, except i also have homocidal desires. i know how bad it can be for people like us. /;-;\

by **Rusty9** » Thu Jun 20, 2013 11:43 pm

Wow, Ikachan! Here you are again. I have far more feeling than you do. I feel both disgust and a shrinking away at seeing an animal tortured. And you just disappeared while I was writing the above sentence. So for the benefit of other readers of your topic:
"
Just lost what I wanted to post. Oh well, It's in your other empathy topic as well as mine which starts with "I'm frustrated..."

by **TkRage** » Fri Jun 21, 2013 2:41 am

Empathy is a weak attempt to avoid getting hurt by other people. Bad news for you is, you do feel empathy. And if you really think you dont, try burning a rabbit alive and hearing its screeches. I bet you wont be able to do it.

by **innocent21** » Sun Jun 30, 2013 8:21 am

You would have to go see a doctor about this.

Trouble being able to feel empathy

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