POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNING
1. Never put your coupons on the conveyer belt. NEVER! I've seen countless times where coupons get sucked up by the belt because I don't notice them quickly enough, (or whoever's cashier). This could lead to you having to pay more money for your order, or missing out on a buy one get one free event.
2. Always put a divider in between your order and the person in front of you. Countless times have I and other cashiers scanned someone elses item(s) because there was no divider to separate the order. This could result in you losing an item or two, maybe more. If there's no divider for you to use, then try to put some space between your order and the person in front of you's order.
3. If you don't want an item in your cart, for whatever reason, please, take it back to where you got it. It's not only rude to the people who have to actually take time out of their busy work schedule to return it, but it's also rude to those who might be looking for that item. If it's something that goes as quickly as a two liter bottle of soda, or something was silly as a bag of candy, someone else might want that, and it might be the last one in the store. Also, if it's meat, milk, something cold, or something that can spoil, by all means, return it to a cold place at least. Not only is it rude to the company, it's rude to other customers who might have to smell it once it spoils. I had to throw away an expensive piece of seafood because someone threw it in with the magazines, and boy oh boy, did it stink.
4. When you're checking out, please, hang up your call. It's so rude for you or anyone else to be on the phone talking to someone while the cashier is talking to you.
5. Treat the employees with respect. They're people too, and they have feelings and emotions, just like you. If they turn the register light off for their break, or to go home, to use the restroom, or to maybe go push carts or do something else in the store, you should understand that they too have an agenda, and you should respect that. It's not their choice to do any of that stuff anyway. Cashiers are like pawn in a chess match. You can't survive without them, and they're a valuable tool, but they're meant to be led. If a cash register is acting up, and they need a key from a manager, realize that that's a computer error, not them. If it is the case of them making a mistake, again, they're human too. No one is perfect. Just remember, they're people too.
6. You should always have your loyalty/savings card ready to go whenever you get in line to check out. If you don't have one, simply tell the cashier right away that you don't, and see if they have a default store one they can use to get you your savings.
7. Once you're done with a cart, please, put it back. Leaving carts in the middle of the store, in the middle of the cart lobby, in the middle of an entrance, in the middle of the street where cars can't avoid it (I've seen it happen), or on the side walk is rude and an inconvenience to those employees with a busy work schedule. Not to mention, it can get in the way of other customers. If you're already in the cart lobby, and say you have a little cart and can carry your groceries to your car, put your cart back instead of letting it sit in the middle of the cart lobby. Stores take pride in how they look, and leaving a cart just sit makes it look sloppy.
8. If you see a mess on the ground, whether it be a broken egg or a small dusting of sugar, please notify an employee about the spill, or if you're able to yourself, clean it up. This is a hazard to those around you, customer or employee, and can cause a serious injury, especially if slippery, This is so employee can put down a caution sign and clean up the mess.
9. Throw all your trash away. The store has many trash cans throughout, and they're easy to locate. Say though, however, you can't find one. Well, then ask one of the store's workers to help you out. Or better yet, ask them to throw away the trash for you. Don't take a sanitizing wipe, wipe your cart down and then throw the damn thing on the floor. Find a trash can.
10. Don't let your kids take a cart. I see time and time again that little kids grab little carts and push them for about five minutes and then just let them sit in the store. I could go on about parents that do this need to either learn to discipline their children or be disciplined themselves, but that's for another time. What this does, however, is take a cart away from someone who might need it. Little carts a popular, no matter what store you go to. They go very fast, and having your child push one for a little while in the store takes it away from other customers. It also takes the time out of the busy employee's schedule who has to put it back
11. If you see a cart sitting on the sidewalk, make sure it's a cart that belongs to the store you're going into. Believe it or not, we have people who come into our store with CVS and Goodwill carts (which we are neither of those two store). Then, after these people check out, where do you think they put these carts? In our cart corals. Yeah, the tiny ass CVS and Good Will carts are put in with out massive carts. They're not even the same colors
12. Don't mix fruit or put more than one package of meet in a single bag. What do I mean when I say that? In every store, they have cheap (and I mean CHEAP) plastic bags you can put these two in with. Because of how easily food can get poisoned, because of how wet certain produce can be, and because of how bloody meat can be. Don't put more than one meat package in a single back, because that means the cashier has to take those packages out, one by one, and scan them, probably getting their fingers bloody in the process. Don't stand there and say "Well I thought you didn't need the bar code," because you sound like a dumby head. Not a single damn place has meat packages the exact same price. They're priced base off of their weight. Same with most produce. And don't mix produce together, because, obviously, an orange pepper costs more than a green one. A honeycrisp apple costs more than a fuji apple.
13. Don't come in at 7 a.m and ask for a lot cash back. That's just stupid, and it makes you look very stupid. Do you honestly think businesses, when they first open, or when it comes time for the day to start, put hundreds, or thousands of dollars in these tills? Believe me, some people do. We have people asking for two hundred, sometimes three hundred dollars (that's the limit) in cash back very early in the morning. While yes, the money is in there, there's about fifty in tens, a hundred in fives, a hundred in ones, and the rest in coins. If you do request that much money back, and the cashier offers it to you in tens and fives, don't stand there and throw a fit because it's not in twenties (yes, it has happened before, and it will happen again).
14. If you want things bagged a certain way, do it yourself. Sure, there are some simple requests, such as "keep all the cold stuff together," but the bagger should be doing that in the first place. Don't ask that question, because it's an insult to the worker. Also, don't bring up a four hundred dollar order and say, "this is four separate orders, and I'd like them bagged separately," and then stand there and do nothing.
15. This is in the same category as the last one. If you have a large order, don't stand there and do nothing while the cashier is scanning the items. Go down to the end of the belt and bag. This isn't acceptable behavior anymore. This is pure laziness. Not only are you holding up the line, you're also giving the already busy cashier more work to do. Now if you're lucky enough to have two people, not including the cashier, bagging for you, then yes, go ahead and stand there. That's alright. If you have a couple things, you should be using the self checkouts, but if you don't do that for some reason (I have no idea why you wouldn't want to), then yes, the cashier can bag for you. If you have a physical aliment, then obviously, the cashier can bag for you. But don't stand there like an butt head, if there's nothing wrong with you, and your order is over thirty items.
16. If you have a check, fill it out. Don't hand it to the cashier for them to fill it out, or for the machine to fill it out. Again, this is just lazy. How long does it take for you to fill out a check? Not very long. Also, who still uses checkbooks? Get a card!
17. If they're out of something, don't throw a hissy fit. Accept the fact that other people wanted that item. If it's something like four for $10 twelve packs of soda, you must understand that that's an unbeatable price, and people are going to flock to that. You know how much you wanted it, now just imagine a lot of other people having those same feelings about it. Shazam! That's why there's none left.
18. If there are long lines, and you only have a couple things, by goodness gracious, use the self checkouts (if your store has them, of course). My store does, and we've had them for years. We were the first store in the area to get them back in about 2002, and Walmart was the second, and they got theirs this year. The self checkout machines don't bite, they don't threaten you, they don't call your mom a whore, they're very simple and easy to use machines. There's a woman, or a man, depending on which option you pick, that will give you step by step instructions, that literally, a five year old could follow. As a matter of a fact, I've literally seen five year old kids flawlessly use these machines, yet adults comes by and doesn't know how to follow simple instructions, and gets mad when the machine malfunctions, because they didn't follow the instructions, and then they get mad at the attendant, because you know, everything is their fault, and the security system went off. Literally every self checkout machine I've used is the exact same. Sure, they might have different designs or different screens, but they're the same. The scanner is on the top, which is also where the scale is to weight your produce, in case of it being sold by it's weight. Then, after you scan it, you PUT IT IN THE BAG, or at least put it down where the bags are at, because that's a scale too, and that makes sure you're not scanning something extremely cheap, like birthday candles, and then putting a over ten pounds of expensive grapes into a bag, without paying for them. Whenever the machine says "please put the item in the bag", DON'T PUT IT BACK IN YOUR CART! It's not like this is just text on the screen, there is literally, LITERALLY a voice, a loud, loud voice, saying to you, again, "Please put the item in the/a bag." Now, people, who are uneducated about technology, believe that the machine can read plastic bags, which, it can't. While technology is a truly mysterious and wonderful thing, we're not that far yet, home boy. Also, don't come to the self checkout, and the very first sign of you doing something, scream "I HATE THESE ######6 THINGS", because you know what, YOU CHOSE TO COME TO THEM!
19. The service area is a place where you can bring small orders as well. Fifteen items or less. That means NO, you can't come here with a $300 order. And before you just start unloading your stuff, please, ask the people in the service area, "Can I check out here?" Because if you put a gallon of milk on the service desk, and I'm the service center associate, I'm going to be thinking of a few different things. Let's list them, shall we?
A) Was it past it's expiration date when you bought it?
B) Would you like to exchange it for another milk, because you grabbed 1% instead of no fat?
C) Would you like to purchase that?
D) Is it leaking?
E) Would you like to return it, because when you got home, you found out that you seemingly had a few gallons in your big fridge (yes, it has happened)
F) Was it spoiled before you took it home?
G) And last but not least, did you find it sitting in the coffee aisle because someone was too lazy to take it back?
21. Always say hello to the cashier. They're people too, and it's rude to not greet someone. If they say hello to you, or tell you to have a good day, say it back to them. It's very rude not too, sausage face.
22. If you have a basket, unload the groceries onto the conveyor belt. Don't just place the basket on the belt. It's lazy and rude to just place it on the belt, not to mention, it adds more work to the cashier, who is probably very busy. It also takes longer for them to scan all your items, which is rude to the people behind you. Placing your items on the belt can get you out of the store quicker.
23. If you see someone placing their items on the belt, and the belt is moving, don't start placing your items onto the belt until they're done. This is rare that someone actually does this, but it interferes with the other person's grocery order and it makes it impossible for them to put their stuff on the belt. Also, hate to be a meanie head, but it makes you look like a stinker weenie.
24. If the price doesn't look like what it should be, according to you, simply just ask "did all the sale prices come through?" Maybe the cashier didn't get your savings card, maybe you forgot to give it to them. Maybe they forgot to scan your coupons, who knows? Don't stand their and scream "that's not right! That's wrong! Wrong!" Again, hate to be a meanie head, but it makes you look like a total butter stick. Also, if you see that something might be wrong with your order on your receipt, don't try going through the cashier's line again, They can do nothing about it. Don't blame it on the cashier either. It's not their fault the computer gave you the price it did. Simply go to service des and talk to one of the service desk associates. They're there for that reason. They'd be more than happy to help you out.
25. Don't call the customer service desk and ask the price of boneless skinless chicken. Believe it or not, it's not their job to know. Their job is to deal with receipts, savings points, money, maybe Western Union or Moneygrams, and maybe the lottery. Their job isn't to know the price of everything in the store and what's on sale and what isn't.
26. If you go to the deli and order an eight piece chicken, don't throw a hissy fit whenever they only allow certain pieces to be in it. Obviously, some pieces cost more than others, and in pretty much all stores, eight piece chicken sets are at a set price, because they can only give you certain pieces.
27. If there's something wrong with your receipt, such as your savings points not adding up, a certain deal not coming off, whatever it may be, act like an adult and don't go off the handle. Your hallowed "customer" status doesn't give you the right to act like an obnoxious bully. Don't scream, don't insult, act like someone with eve an ounce of dignity. If you made a mistake - which believe it or not, the customer isn't always right - realize it and work with the customer service rep to fix that mistake.
BOUNS
TRIGGER WARNING
28. If something doesn't go your way, don't call corporate and complain. If the store moves something to a new aisle, if the store stops doing a raffle drawing for bringing in your own bags, if the store only has one cashier after 9 P.M (Christ forbid!), don't call corporate and complain. Seriously, if you do this, get a life. Also, if you're one of these people who tell someone that you're calling corporate on them, grow a pair. Seriously, you're a gutless coward. These people aren't allowed to say anything back to you, because corporations think it's good for business to placate these vulgar jack offs.
END TRIGGER WARNING
Yes yes. Always be polite and not a burnt bagel.
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