My first post. Please help.

Hello everyone. I am new to the forums. Recently I have been doing some research. I have come to the conclusion that I have IED. I have had IED since I was a small child. I remember having it as young as 4 or 5 years old. I was never diagnosed with it, because I just thought I had a short temper.
After breaking yet another $1100 T.V yesterday I decided that I might need help.Yes, I broke our T.V on Christmas day. I have broken over $100,000 of my own property. You read that right, I break everything when my IED acts up. I have broken cars, motorcycles, phones, T.Vs and anything else in my way. You name it and I have destroyed it.
I have never hurt a person in my outbursts, but I am scared that my kids are becoming like me. I don't know how, but my wife has stuck by me thus far.
As a kid I had epilepsy and think this is where my IED originated from. I can't go on living like this anymore. Is anyone else like me out there? I have read multiple posts, but I seem to be a little different from others with IED. Does anyone else break this much stuff? Please tell me that I am not alone. I also have extreme night time anxiety. PTSD from Afghanistan? I don't know. I am also very anxious and nervous in public. I can't be around crowds for very long either. I am so messed up and don't know where to start. Please, any advice is accepted. Thank you for listening.

P.S. Excuse my grammar, as I am posting from my phone. Yes it is new do to me destroying the other one.

First know that you are not alone and it takes a brave person to ask for help. I am so happy you have kept your impulse issues to things, not people. It sounds like your PTSD is the leader of the the pack for your symptoms as it can encompass all the things you wrote about. PTSD changes your brain, meaning you do not think or react like most people. It can effect things like temperature regulation and impulse control. Night time anxiety is also very common as is rage. Your fight or flight centre is broken, your brain interprets non-threatening situations as threatening and so you react.

It took me a long time to get better control and sometimes I still loose it, but it can be done. I find what makes me calm and I do it, for me it can be cleaning (controlling the internal chaos by taking care of the external) or singing so loud it is really screaming. Maybe for you it is working out or recalling a set of facts. Find a way to channel it, but don't do it alone. Find help, there are support groups.

Until then don't forget to breath, keep a pen and paper by your bed and write down what is keeping you awake, keep a journal, talk to your family about how you feel, keep active, buy some cheap pillows and stash them around the house so you can tear them apart when you loose control and read/watch tv to take a break from your life.

We are all broken in some way and that is what makes us who we are. Would I like to not have PTSD? Of course, but would I be as good of a teacher without it, I'm not sure. It is our healed cracks that allow us to see others and to help. Without my struggles would I be able to help my daughter with her IED or my son with his anxiety or my students with their wonderful array of cracks? You will get trough this and be a better parent and person for it.