Please help me help my wife

My wife has had chronic insomnia for going on 3 years now. We are unsure of what triggered it (if anything), other than she had a partial hysteroctomy around the same time, however they left one overy. The Drs. have checked her hormone levels, and they are all within the acceptable ranges.

Her primary problem is falling asleep, because once asleep, she tends to sleep through the night. She has been on Ambien, which cause really strange dreams. She has taken a couple other types of sleep meds, which none worked. They finally settled on Lunesta @ 1mg, which worked really well for a while. About 15-20 minutes after taking it, she was pretty dizzy and nearly needed help getting to bed. Falling asleep wasn't a problem, and she rarely remembered anything after getting in bed. She still had a few episodes of insomnia, but mainly due to the kids being out late or other issue causing her to stay up and worry.

The 1mg stopped working after a while, so they moved her to the 2mg, which put her back in her normal routine. There were even times that one of the kids could be out late, come home, and her not remember it in the morning. This went on for a while until she started having more episodes of sleeplessness.

Then (you guessed it), she moved to the 3mg. That didn't take as much time to run its course, as she is currently taking the 3mg and a 25mg dose of Benadryl. She is still having some insomnia, often 4-5 days in a row with 4 or so hours of sleep.

We ended up switching doctors, and when she told him she was also taking a 12Hr Allegra-D at night, he told her that might be the problem. We did some reading, and sure enough, nearly 14% of patients on Allegra-D have insomnia. It all started making sense, since she had been on the Allegra for about the same amount of time as the insomnia. We, along with the handful of doctors she met with never put the two together. We really thought we had the miracle cure we had been looking for. She immediately went completely off the Allegra, hoping to get her night-life back. In fact, about 1-2 days after going off it, she got tired and fell asleep one afternoon like she used to do, but had not since the onset of the insomnia.

Now, after more than a week since stopping the Allegra, it's almost back to the same-old, same-old with the sleepless nights and frustration.

I know I've gone into a lot of detail here, and perhaps a bit too much information, but I'm just looking for some good advice and information. Is it possible that the Allegra-D is the cause of her insomnia, and even though she is no longer taking it, she is still feeling the effects with the insomnia? Is there anything else out there, or are we just stuck with this? Thank you in advance for any and all feedback.

Steve

Steve, I'm not a professional and cannot comment specifically on all of the tablets that she has taken for this. Im just wondering if she is generally an anxious/stressed person though?; or does she have some habit that she does before bedtime which could make her stressed? Or, does she eat a meal or drink coffee before bed? The goal should be to get this sorted without medicatio. Have you also tried just changing the room that the bed is in? Sometimes a change in scenerey can help.

Kevin

Hi Steve,

It's really sweet how concerned you are for you wife - involving yourself and trying to understand the situation and help her. She's a lucky lady

I'm also not a doc, so please keep that in mind. What I DO know is the nightmare of insomnia, and mine is the same as your wife's. Cant fall asleep, lie awake for a few hours or sometimes all night. Once I actually get to sleep I'm ok.
From what you've described it does sound like this Allegra could have initiated the problem. But I imagine that with all the sleeping pills she has tried since this started her whole rhythm is completely out of whack and it's no wonder that she has a hard time now going to sleep naturally. The advice I'd give you guys from my own experience would be to rough it for a while. Take no more pills. Endure the sleeplessness for now. Do things that help relax her and improve her chances of falling asleep naturally and hope that he body will readjust to it's natural pattern quickly.
Here are some of the things that often work for me:
- some kind of gentle, relaxing exercise before bed. Yoga, for instance. Or anything that gently stretches her muscles, eases tension in the body, with a focus on breathing and calming the mind. If she can't or doesn't want to do this then just some stretching and a few minutes of deep breathing might work too.
- avoiding stimulants late in the day (sugar and caffeine in particular, both of which hide in more foods and drinks that we often realize)
- Stop watching TV and working on the computer at least 2 hours before bedtime (something about the stimulation and also about the light from these screens which tells the brain that it's daytime and that it should be awake)
- Lots of physical activity during the day if poss (even just extra speed housecleaning or a brisk walk to the store or whatever)
- If it doesn't bother YOU too much she might try listening to soft, relaxing music when trying to fall asleep, or white noise. I like to listen to audio books very softly (my boyfriend falls asleep in minutes so he doesn't mind Gives me something to focus on when my mind wants to start wandering or worrying. And maybe it remind me of being read to as a kid as bed time
- You could try massaging her with aromatherapy oils that relax the mind and body
- Sex, if that's an option. But it's gotta be exhausting and fullfilling
- Get up and go to sleep at the same time every day, forcing a rhythm for her body to get used to, even if she can't sleep (i.e. try not to sleep in just because she's been awake half the night)
- A hot bath before bed (should be very hot. Appearantly the drop in body temperature when you get out mimics then drop in temperature when you go to sleep, and so sends the signal to the body that it's time to konk out And then there's all the stuff about e.g. warm milk with honey, ginger tea, magnesium supplements and so on, the kind of advice I'm sure you have coming out of your ears, but which may help a bit in combination with other things. Worth a try anyway.


I can't think of anything else right now. But if she can stand it (and I know it's hard) I would give these kinds of things a try and stay away from the drugs for a while, see what happens.
Oh one more thing that just popped to mind - how old is your wife? When my mom hit 55 or so and came into her menopause phase she had big trouble falling asleep for a few years too. Seems that is a very common problem for women. They say hormone replacement therapy really helps in that case (my mom reacted very badly to that and had to stop, so I can't tell you if it would have worked.) My mom is 59 now and those problems are mostly gone.

Well, I wish you guys all the best and hope it's over soon. Let us know if anything helps or works for her

Lara
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Kevin & Lara, thank you so much for the detailed replies.

Kevin,
She does have a lot on her plate (pre-adult/teen girls, her mother's health, and of course, me - ha,ha), but normally, she does a pretty good job of leaving her stress out of the bedroom. Typically nothing to eat or drink 1-2 hours before bedtime. We did talk about moving the bed around, but we sleep on a waterbed, so that would have to be proven effective before moving it.

Lara,
I called the maker of Allegra and spoke with one of their pharmacists. Their research has shown the half-life of the "D" portion of the Allegra (the part that causes the insomnia) to be 4-5 hours. To be safe, they multiply this by a factor of 5, so according to them, it should be completely out of the system within 20-25 hours. My thoughts are much like yours, that the Allegra perhaps initiated the problem, and now it is more of a root-problem as opposed to a symptom or side-effect. She has continued to not take the Allegra, however she pays the price with her allergies acting up. Also still taking the Lunesta and Benadryl at night.

We've talked about trying to "reset" her body back to a normal sleeping pattern. From your description, it sounds as if you've been through that before. How did it work for you, and are you still med-free and sleeping normally?

The relaxation examples you've given make me tired just thinking about them Sex is always an option, and I always meet the requirements (or at least I try my best). We usually try to keep a pretty good routine with when we go to bed, but we're not so good about the TV. When the news/weather is over, we go to bed and end up watching for another 20-30 minutes while her meds kick in. If I watch longer, she will fall asleep first, which is always a bonus.

She is 42 years old, so hopefully she's a few years away from menopause.

We'll give some more thought and discussion to dropping the meds, which is the eventual goal. Thanks again for the advice. Please let us know if you have any other thoughts and/or your experience with going off the meds.

Steve

Hey Steve,

About throwing her body out of whack - I wasn't talking about the Allegra, actually, I was talking about the sleeping pills that she started taking because of the Allegra. Those sleeping pills are likely the major culprit now. In my experience and that of many people I've talked to, the emotional and physical dependence on those things kicks in FAST. Because not sleeping is such a major pain in the ***, a quick fix (pill) seems like a godsend, but all it does IMHO is reinforce a vicious cycle that makes your ability to sleep naturally less and less while making your need for medicating yourself (in ever larger quantities due to tolerance) greater and greater.
Stopping the pills WILL be hard. The thing is that is doesn't get easier over time, it gets harder. If she's not careful she can easily end up in a position in which the pills don't work anymore because her tolerance is so high, and then she'll STILL have to stop taking them, go through withdrawals, emotional and/or physical, find it extremely hard to sleep naturally and have a really sh*t time of it before she gets back to her natural patterns. That is to say: she might as well do it now. The sooner the better. That's the best advice I can give you.

I don't think describing my situation will really help you guys, because it's a different kind of thing. I've been dealing with insomnia since I was 13 (am 29 now). I can't tell you a tale of miraculous cures, unfortunately In your wife's case though it sounds as though she slept fine until she started the Allegra, so it seems possible that her insomnia really is based mainly on chemicals messing with her body. (Rather than anxiety, tension, a mind that won't lie still blablabla). You will know if that interpretation fits her situation. If it does then I can only repeat - get off the drugs. Let her body heal itself. Doing it slowly is always best. If she takes the pills every night, she could start with taking them every second night. Wean herself off gently, and while she is doing that she can incorporate some of the relaxation methods I mentioned before, or take some herbal supplement instead... I find for me that it is good to do things that 'trick' me and my body into believing that there is a crutch, that there is some kind of help. Whether something really works to tire the body or whether it's just a placebo - it's good either way. The mental/emotional addiction to the medication, the belief that you won't be able to sleep without help, is addressed this way. At least for me.
The liver also plays a part in healthy sleeping. With all these pills your wife's been taking her liver is probably pretty stressed. I'd look into doing something for that - certainly can't hurt. Eating/drinking foods that support liver function, maybe starting a milkthistle supplement. Somebody on one of these forums mentioned something about castor oil compresses for the liver that are doing wonders for her insomnia. I haven't looked into that yet but I'm sure if you do a search online you'll find some info on that.

LOL another novel. I do like to get carried away I feel very strongly about those meds though - in the long run no good can come of them. I'll still take an OTC pill or a benzodiazepine when all else fails, but I don't let myself do that more than 2-3 times a month TOPS, no matter what. That way they provide very effective relief when I reeeeaaally need it, but there is no addiction, no tolerance, and no taking away the chance for my body to do it's thing naturally whenever it can.

Lara

Steve, Lara seems to hve more knowledge in this area than I have, and I will therefore leafve you in her trusty hands. There is one thing I think must be cleared up: Has your wife ever given herself enough time to 'wean' off all of these prescription and non-0prescription medications? I ask because it can take a few days for our bodies to 'recover' from taking medication, just as a person smoking or taking drugs requires time to come off taking each of those. When I took a sleeping tablet to help me sleep, it was hell... ...and the night after I stopped taking it was hell times two.

Has she any major physical symptoms such as muscle spasms?

Kevin

flunitrazepam is the answer to all problems.

Chucky wrote:Steve, I'm not a professional and cannot comment specifically on all of the tablets that she has taken for this. Im just wondering if she is generally an anxious/stressed person though?; or does she have some habit that she does before bedtime which could make her stressed? Or, does she eat a meal or drink coffee before bed? The goal should be to get this sorted without medicatio. Have you also tried just changing the room that the bed is in? Sometimes a change in scenerey can help.

Kevin

Hi,

In this kind of situation we have to coop up with the person be creating very healthy and positive environment as half of the problems will get solve by maintaining the right orra behind that person as, it is very important to try to figure out the situation, she is suffering like one can try to change the room or can try to change the bed and even the colour of room which can also proves to be beneficial in this case. Medication, is not the only solution and it will affect your body or your brain for some span of time but after that what will one can do to deal with the situation, as half of the problems will get solve when the atmosphere is right that is positive. Try to create very confident environment and with that it will better if one can start with some exercises or meditation that will relax your mind, body and soul.

Thanks

*Edited by admin - Chucky