Insomnia when with girlfriend....

Hey everybody!
Up until now, I have always been an "easy sleeper". I need to be in a specific position (always the same) to fall asleep, but usually fall asleep within 10-15 minutes.
Sometimes of course, when I'm a little nervous about something, it can take over an hour but that's during exam periods for instance.

I have been with this wonderful girl for 6 months now and we spend the nights together 1-3 times a week. She's asleep once her head touches the pillow but not me... I stay awake and toss and turn for about 30 minutes, and then my heart starts to beat real hard and fast and I sweat an awful lot. At that point, I know I'm not going to sleep...
Everything in my relationship is getting better and better except for this sleeping problem which is getting more and more regular. I "get around it" by drinking myself to sleep, but then I wake up when the alcohol fades and it's the same problem getting back to sleep again...

It makes me sort of laugh when it happens, but I just don't want to be tired the following day because I tend to "paint everything black" when I'm exhausted and I just want to be able to sleep with my girlfriend in my arms instead of sweating and feeling angry at myself.

Anyway, sorry for the long text, I just wanted to be as clear as possible. I truly hope somebody understands my situation and can help me find a way out of it (I am already reading all the advice in this section of the forum and am always trying to find a good solution).
Thank you very much!

Hi rufus

When your trying to sleep are you very aware of the fact that your lying beside her?

I find it very difficult to sleep next to someone if I really like them. I think even if im really tired im still aware of there close proximity and are so daunted and excited by it I become ill at ease and restless. And the realisation and fustration of not being able to seep just makes it worse.

Try some relaxation techniques.

Remember that when your tossing and turning at night your not the only one. At the same time their are a millions of others around the world doing the exact same thing.

Hi coldhands,
Thanks a lot for your helpful reply.

You describe the feelings very well. I am aware of the fact that she is beside me, since when I am alone at night, I am more relaxed and fall asleep way more easily.

What relaxation techniques do you recommend? I am confident I will overcome this little problem but don't know quite how to do it or how long it will take me...

Hi Rufus,

I seem to have the exact same problem as you. I actually just posted a new thread before reading yours detailing pretty much the same issue. Is the first relationship you have been in? It's interesting about the whole 'being aware' of them next to you. Do you find it only happens on a work night? I can sleep fine when on my own but when I sleep with my girlfriend maybe 1 to 3 times a week, if its a work night I will lie awake for about half an hour and then start stressing about not getting to sleep. The weird thing is it doesn't always happen. It actually went for a couple of weeks but now seems to have started again. Like yourself, I really enjoy being in the the relationship and its going really well. Have you discovered anything which has worked out for you? One thing we tried once was sleeping separately in bed but I was still aware of 'trying' to get to sleep by thinking about it too much. Anyway let me know if it starts to sort itself out for you.

Cheers
Adam