Not sure where to post. [selective mutism]

I was mostly mute for close to 8 years, until i was 18. People seem happier when I'm silent, seem to think better of me when I don't screw up by giving my opinion. I'm 21 now. I had been getting over my mutism and was doing well until a few months ago. The people around me are simultaneously making me feel like $#%^ for speaking and probing for why I don't want to speak. I can't get through to them that its their actions- any time I try they throw up their hands and spew excuses for why its not their fault.

I'm home bound with a long term illness. Getting away from them isn't an option right now. Could someone help me find some sort of way to get past this? I'm so out of it that I'm struggling to find decent resources. I don't want to be silent.

Thinking of Raj from Big Bang Theory my suggestion would be try talking when no one's around to get practice. When around those who would normally initiate the mutism try closing your eyes and getting a word or two out, over time as you manage that increase the wordage. Try opening your eyes then but turned away from them, practice that a bit, then try try it facing them eyes open and just getting 1 or 2 words out.

A long journey begins with a single step. - Chinese proverb

Therapy for this sort of thing too is a process, not an all at once solution. Learn to crawl before trying to walk, learn to walk before trying to run.

That sounds really promising. I'm going to give it a shot...thank you so much.

You'll get there! Just keep practicing. Every skill we have comes from repetition. Seek out every opportunity to talk to people and by yourself and you'll do great!