Question for others with HPD or those who know them well.

Is it normal for histrionics to periodically withdraw from everyone?

I am wondering if this is part of my HPD or if its just me. Every couple weeks I get emotionally exhausted and I want to withdraw and be by myself to regroup, reconsider things, and recharge.
I do not do that to get attention...I can have attention whenever I want it. I just feel like everyone expects me to be perfect and on my game all the time and something I feel like I just that time alone.

What do you think? Is this normal of histrionics?

From my experience with my ex HPD, Yes.

She used to stop answering calls and seeing anyone for a couple of days, with very dark mood. every couple of months.

Yeah my ex would have those kind of moments too. She would be more quiet than usual and seem empty and depress.

thank you for your responses.

I would love to know why we do that.

Hi nights,
I have HPD traits. I had a hard time being with people continually because it was so exhausting. I think when I'm alone, I can just be myself, let my hair down and just in general be myself, but when I'm with someone, I feel like I have to be reserved and feminine and well maintain my image and it's sooooooooo tiring for me. Also, not being a genuine person is hard work.

I have to repress every thing about me that I think they won't approve of and that's really physically demanding.

nowheregirl wrote:Hi nights,
I have HPD traits. I had a hard time being with people continually because it was so exhausting. I think when I'm alone, I can just be myself, let my hair down and just in general be myself, but when I'm with someone, I feel like I have to be reserved and feminine and well maintain my image and it's sooooooooo tiring for me. Also, not being a genuine person is hard work.

I have to repress every thing about me that I think they won't approve of and that's really physically demanding.

SOOOOO TRUE!

nightsinlondon wrote:Is it normal for histrionics to periodically withdraw from everyone?

I am wondering if this is part of my HPD or if its just me. Every couple weeks I get emotionally exhausted and I want to withdraw and be by myself to regroup, reconsider things, and recharge.
I do not do that to get attention...I can have attention whenever I want it. I just feel like everyone expects me to be perfect and on my game all the time and something I feel like I just that time alone.

What do you think? Is this normal of histrionics?

Honestly, no. HPD and all extroverts in fact gain energy by being around people. Introverts are the ones who put on a mask, be social for a while, then recharge their batteries in isolation. I'm not just being contrarian here; this is NOT typical of HPD. Also, there is no taking off the mask...with HPD you ARE the mask. I think you're just a type A personality hun

These are valid points. If you don't respond, at least consider them.

Mine would do this whenever she had some sort of serious stressor in her life to deal with, but I cant be too sure that she was withdrawing with others, just me. She did not handle stress well. And there was usually an explosion in fan club recruitment soon afterwards.

My HPD friend did that 'decompressing' in cycles, where she'd spend a lot of time sitting at home, sleeping, and generally just avoiding people. It really looked like extreme depression from the outside - depressed people don't want to get out of bed, have crying jags, ect, ect. It seemed she went in to a decompressing cycle whenever she didn't get what she wanted out of a specific situation. for example, my friend was playing two fan clubbers off each other at once (both lesbians, my friend is bisexual and she pretended to be each girl's 'girlfriend' for a time), then they both ditched her and hooked up with each other when they found out about the depths of her duplicity. LOL.. lesbian love triangle gone 'wrong' for her, as both parties ditched her and started dating each other! anyway, after that whole situation blew up, she spent a good several months in a depressive state - because she 'lost the game', essentially. She didn't speak of the sitaution as though she had genune remorse over hurting these people or as if she truly missed their company, she spoke of the stiatuion in terms of 'who was right, who was wrong, who won.' and that's generally how she looks at life. if she 'wins' she's bubbly and happy, if she 'loses' she gets depressed.

for her, a 'win' would be her manipulations go unnoticed, she gathers attention from multiple parties, and nobody is the wiser. I believe she really enjoyed that thought of putting one over on people, from the way she talked about her relationships. she would bring up sneaky little things she had done as though she was proud of that. it was a little off-putting for me to hear her talk about these things, though I don't think she even noticed my reaction. she was too busy giving herself verbal pats on the back for screwing other people over and getting away with it. lol

treetop wrote:My HPD friend did that 'decompressing' in cycles, where she'd spend a lot of time sitting at home, sleeping, and generally just avoiding people. It really looked like extreme depression from the outside - depressed people don't want to get out of bed, have crying jags, ect, ect. It seemed she went in to a decompressing cycle whenever she didn't get what she wanted out of a specific situation. for example, my friend was playing two fan clubbers off each other at once (both lesbians, my friend is bisexual and she pretended to be each girl's 'girlfriend' for a time), then they both ditched her and hooked up with each other when they found out about the depths of her duplicity. LOL.. lesbian love triangle gone 'wrong' for her, as both parties ditched her and started dating each other! anyway, after that whole situation blew up, she spent a good several months in a depressive state - because she 'lost the game', essentially. She didn't speak of the sitaution as though she had genune remorse over hurting these people or as if she truly missed their company, she spoke of the stiatuion in terms of 'who was right, who was wrong, who won.' and that's generally how she looks at life. if she 'wins' she's bubbly and happy, if she 'loses' she gets depressed.

for her, a 'win' would be her manipulations go unnoticed, she gathers attention from multiple parties, and nobody is the wiser. I believe she really enjoyed that thought of putting one over on people, from the way she talked about her relationships. she would bring up sneaky little things she had done as though she was proud of that. it was a little off-putting for me to hear her talk about these things, though I don't think she even noticed my reaction. she was too busy giving herself verbal pats on the back for screwing other people over and getting away with it. lol

Going into isolation to recharge, regroup, and evaluate your situation is different from going into isolation because you're semi-depressed that you didn't get what you want......lol

Stop trying to confirm everything she's saying with your own experiences...they are probably different.

GOD, just because someone SAYS they are a textbook histrionic doesn't mean they ARE. You people are so suggestible, lol. PLUS, nobody is a clearcut histrionic because nobody has personality traits JUST from the HPD category. You can be predominately HPD like many of the other posters on this forum, but you can't be 100% HPD. That's just theoretical #######4. Even clinicians say this.