General Anxiety Disorder... so she says.

November 2013: Shaking. A very odd sensation of something rising through my spine into the back of my head. Near-fainting. Massive breakdown at work. Requested medical leave.

December 2013-March 2014: Home. Shaking persists 24/7. Primary doctor rules out physical illness. Prescribes Paxil 10mg for Social Anxiety: No result. Doctor prescribes Paxil CR 25mg: No result. Doctor adds Abilify on top: No result. Prescribes Xanax and Klonopin for emergencies: No result, just sleepy. Physically. emotionally ill. Constant headache. Nausea. Buzzing in head. Unable to wrest myself from home. Tapers off Paxil and Abilify with great difficulty. Quits job.

July 2014: First appointment with a psychiatrist. She diagnoses me with General Anxiety Disorder. Claims I have a serotonin imbalance and therapy would be ineffective. Prescribes Lexapro. Cannot afford, takes 20mg of Celexa instead. No result.

August 2014: Second appointment with psychiatrist. Prescribes 40mg of Celexa: No result. 10mg of Valium: No result, just sleepy. Celexa begins mimicking symptoms of Paxil. Personally lower my dose to 20mg & abruptly quit. No major withdrawal.

Constant state: Subtle vibrations 24/7, particularly strong upon waking. Continue to experience spine-to-neck near-fainting sensation in large crowds, lines, playing video games.

Point to note: Does not experience a conscious state of worry or fear. No difficulty sleeping & does not wake up in panic. Feels very disconnected from emotional reaction and emotional feeling.

I've never considered myself to be an anxious person. I've spontaneously performed dances in front of hundreds. I was a person of authority at my job. I am self-confident: I think I am intelligent, pretty; not easily offended or quick to anger. Relaxed, down-to-earth personality. Enjoy working. On personality tests, I always score low for anxiety.

My 3rd appointment with my psychiatrist is in a week. No progress to report to her. She suggested previously to either try brand-name SSRI or SNRI in future. Opinions? Recommended medication? New psychiatrist?

Did you get an MRI, EEG, Spinal tap? I would do those first, to make sure it's not something neurological.

There's no point in taking psychiatric medications if you feel like they aren't helping you. Many of those meds can create bad side effects down the road.

Hi there

Welcome to the forum.

Unfortunately there are no professionals here on the site, so no-one can really give you advice on what the problem might be or what meds will work for you. Medication is a very individual thing- what works well for me might have heaps of side effects or do absolutely nothing for you and vice versa. I have had some meds in the past that have just not done anything for me at all- sometimes it's a case of finding the right combination for you.

Perhaps one of the other meds is worth a try- a decision only you and your psychiatrist can make. If you're not happy with things, then maybe it is worth seeking out another opinion.

Take care
Lily

Thank you both for the reply. I am currently seeing a therapist and quit medication altogether, to much relief. The SNRI, Effexor, did not work for me, so my psychiatrist recommended a therapist for EMDR therapy. We've had 3 appointments together so far and have discussed my issues, past and present, in great length. She has identified childhood traumas to be particularly upsetting to me, in addition to my agorophobia. However, when asked what emotion I associate with these panic attacks which result in tears, I blank. I failed the EMDR therapy because no emotion can be attached to memories my brain finds upsetting. In fact, I found the repetitive movement to be relaxing. My homework is to go to uncomfortable places and record my emotions, which I have, but find no emotions to record.

I can only describe my reactions as similar to an automated responce. For example, when stepping into bright light, the pupil dialates and the eyes squint. We have no control over this process. This is how I feel my anxiety functions.

I am in my early 20's, so it's hard to imagine having any of the diseases of the mind associated with age. If it was a neurological condition, would it not appear in my previous blood work? Any insight into this would be helpful. I am seeing a family therapist, but perhaps I need to see someone more specialized. I am unsure of which type of professional to seek next, but my therapist has already assured me that she will refer me to someone else if all is naught. We will begin CBT next week and I will try to identify these emotions I am apparently experiencing.

It might take awhile before you can actually understand what was going on. I remember the first time I started being anxious and I had no idea what was going on. It was sudden, it was ugly and it caused a lot of trouble for me. On top of that, I didn't get the assistance I required at the time (I was in high school and the therapist there was a quack, thought I was antisocial).

It's only 10 years later (yeah, 10) that I finally put the finger on what I am actually dealing with, and after a breakup, of all things. I hope it won't take that much time for you, I really do. I'm just saying it might take time to work around the fact that you can't really tell how you feel, because it was the same for me. It was something I couldn't describe.