Aroused By Bullying.

I'm gay. I've grown up being bullied due to being skinny & extremely shy. When I was 12 or 13, first getting into masturbation, I started getting turned on by thoughts of other boys bullying me. It's more of the thought of another person thinking they are superior to me. I fantasize about licking their shoes, kissing their butts(with a devilish smile on their face), having to eat food that the dominate has already chewed on but spit out, have them puke on me or even having them use me as a toilet. I have paid other boys to dominate me in these ways, minus the using as a toilet. Though, I have masturbated with a piece of my own feces in my mouth, pretending it belonged to a bully using me as a toilet.

My first bullying experience I recall was when I attended a day camp during the summer time, before my 1st grade year. This one boy constantly would get the other boys to push me outside naked, when we were changing to go swimming or changing back into our daily clothes. They eventually stopped, but I continued to be verbally bullied. When I was in 2nd grade, this woman who lived down the street, babysat me. She had a son, also in the 2nd grade that bullied me, constantly talking down to me. I was too embarrassed to tell on him. These were my first two bullies. I disliked them back when it was happening, but now I wish I could tell them how cool they were.

Lately, I've been fantasizing about grooming a young boy into becoming a bully & have him dominate some pathetic weakling, until he breaks his victim & makes him completely submissive to him. I then tell him how awesome he is or give him something to help reinforce that the bullying he is doing is appropriate.

I like to see others being bullied, but I don't want it to lead to suicide. I would like to see the victims be turned into masochist or become stronger in the areas they are weak, possibly becoming bullies themselves. How do you break someone without having them, get to the point where they want to kill themselves?

Like it is in the animal kingdom, where the powerful animals dominate(eat) the weaker animals, it is primal instinct for the stronger humans to dominate the weaker.If victims would just learn to respect "nature's hierarchy" of people being superior to other people, they wouldn't feel so much pain. During my preteens years the bullying I experienced, hurt, but now that I've accepted my role in "nature's hierarchy" I'm at peace.

Nfinity wrote:I'm gay. I've grown up being bullied due to being skinny & extremely shy. When I was 12 or 13, first getting into masturbation, I started getting turned on by thoughts of other boys bullying me. It's more of the thought of another person thinking they are superior to me. I fantasize about licking their shoes, kissing their butts(with a devilish smile on their face), having to eat food that the dominate has already chewed on but spit out, have them puke on me or even having them use me as a toilet. I have paid other boys to dominate me in these ways, minus the using as a toilet. Though, I have masturbated with a piece of my own feces in my mouth, pretending it belonged to a bully using me as a toilet.

My first bullying experience I recall was when I attended a day camp during the summer time, before my 1st grade year. This one boy constantly would get the other boys to push me outside naked, when we were changing to go swimming or changing back into our daily clothes. They eventually stopped, but I continued to be verbally bullied. When I was in 2nd grade, this woman who lived down the street, babysat me. She had a son, also in the 2nd grade that bullied me, constantly talking down to me. I was too embarrassed to tell on him. These were my first two bullies. I disliked them back when it was happening, but now I wish I could tell them how cool they were.

Lately, I've been fantasizing about grooming a young boy into becoming a bully & have him dominate some pathetic weakling, until he breaks his victim & makes him completely submissive to him. I then tell him how awesome he is or give him something to help reinforce that the bullying he is doing is appropriate.

I like to see others being bullied, but I don't want it to lead to suicide. I would like to see the victims be turned into masochist or become stronger in the areas they are weak, possibly becoming bullies themselves. How do you break someone without having them, get to the point where they want to kill themselves?

Like it is in the animal kingdom, where the powerful animals dominate(eat) the weaker animals, it is primal instinct for the stronger humans to dominate the weaker.If victims would just learn to respect "nature's hierarchy" of people being superior to other people, they wouldn't feel so much pain. During my preteens years the bullying I experienced, hurt, but now that I've accepted my role in "nature's hierarchy" I'm at peace.

That was a very powerful and well written post. I have the same issues and I'm aroused by it for the exact reason you are: the bully feeling that they are superior to me and the focus on the power of the dominant animals. I'm aroused by being the weaker animal. In high school there were 3 strong jocks who forced me to wait on them in the cafeteria, I had to be the one who got up from the table and went to get them extra forks, spoons, and napkins everyday. They threatened to beat me up if I didn't do this so I always did what I was told to do. At some point the feeling of being afraid that they would hurt me turned sexual and I became aroused by the fear and by their power over me. And I agree with you that once you accept submission and that you can't defeat the dominant animals it is like a tremendous burden/pain that is removed.

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