Success, of sorts :/

((Hugs if wanted))

Thank you x

Hey. Just wanted to say I can relate to how you're feeling, and I'm just so sorry it's so hard for you. Life is a big crap hole sometimes, isn't it. Do you have anyone you feel understands, and who doesn't expect you to be someone you are not? I'm glad at least you have your horse. I know how important animals can be. I have had one of my cats for about 8 years. He's seen me through some really hard times, and I can't imagine what I would do without him.

If it helps, you have really provided some valuable support and insight to people on here, including myself. So even if you don't feel valued elsewhere, you are valued here.

Well today I get messed around some more. My social worker phoned. She got told yesterday that she is swapping jobs with someone on another team for a year, so she can't be my social worker any more. So now I have another new one, the swap guy. I meet him on Monday. *sigh*

brandic wrote: Do you have anyone you feel understands, and who doesn't expect you to be someone you are not?

I have a support worker at a mental health charity who fits this description, but there's a limit to how much he can be there for me. In that way it's better that I have a social worker, also because they hold more authority with the benefits agency, but social workers are too stretched for time to do such a good job in helping me as my support worker. I can't keep my support worker though, if I'm involved with the mental health team and have a social worker, because the charity doesn't have the funds to help people who have access to alternative help.

brandic wrote:If it helps, you have really provided some valuable support and insight to people on here, including myself. So even if you don't feel valued elsewhere, you are valued here.

Thank you, that's very kind. X

That's a shame. As if your world isn't unpredictable and unstable enough (at least, it is for me). Hope the meeting with this new guy goes okay.

Bourbon

Glad to hear the good news, Kerry,

We seem to think exactly the same, so I relate entirely, except for the horse, I don't have any horse.

I have been working the system for about 6 months, and it is just starting to look up. I had an appointment today with some heath worker, probably some psychologist for next week. And I had one with my social worker last week. Of course, those things will vary by country.

I also don't think I will change, and a part of me does not want to change either. I am also tired of fighting the normal world, and becoming one of them is not particularly appealing. I somewhat go with the flow and try not to worry about the future, and hope things will fix themselves somehow to a satisfying degree.

It seems I am a little conflicted about the issue because I had a nightmare a couple days ago about just that. I never dream, so that was a surprise. But I was pretty much screaming to some character that I was who I was, and that was it. Said character was trying to make me organize and classify stuff, while all I wanted was my free lunch.

But in any case, those people will listen to me as I really am, for maybe the first time in my life, so I figure to give it a chance. It will be entertaining at the very least. I suppose they have seen others, so I doubt I would impress them. I consider it as an opportunity to learn more about myself. In the end, that is where the work needs to happen, if it needs to happen. Only time can tell.

Hi tungsten sorry you're having the same issues as me and I hope the mental health team can help you.

Things keep getting stranger and strange for me. I had what I thought would be my last meeting, with my support worker from the charity, today. But no. He's not happy with the (lack of) care being provided by the mental health team, so he's going to keep seeing me every 2wks, in-between my social workers phone calls. He says I have to go with the mental health team's proposed care plan for now so as not to be seen to be being awkward, which is fine because it makes sense to me anyway to lose some stress. But he wants me to have more frequent psych appointments and says they should be doing more to help me because they're not trying hard enough. Unless they raise their game I think the mental health team will be getting their butts kicked again at some point. So that makes me feel a bit better.

I got asked if I hear voices though, which I didn't really know how to answer, I was a bit cagey and if he was watching closely he would have seen a panic reaction. I said only my own voices, that I talk to myself a lot and it doesn't bother me. I said it isn't voices outside in the room and that I've been told I'm not psychotic. So now I'm worried if my support worker suspects DID or not. Probably not though, since most people seem totally ignorant of it. He's seen me extremely shut down with depersonalization before and I mentioned today that I have occasional hallucinations, so he probably was wondering if I have schizophrenia. I should probably be worried about that, but I'm not. I'm just thinking please please please don't tell the mental health team I may have DID! X

Unfortunately, I very much doubt that someone in the UK in a support worker type job would suspect DID - so does that help with your fear of them telling your treatment team?

I'm glad this person has pulled through though and is going to continue seeing you whilst s/he doesn't think the NHS is giving you enough support. That is good.

Thinking of you,

Bourbon

Yeh I don't really think he suspects DID, I'm probably just worrying over nothing there. Although they are all freakily on-the-ball in the mental health charity. I don't know what training they've had, but they pick up on every little thing of importance I mention & question me about it, far more so than anyone else I've been in contact with. The support worker I had last year, before my appointment came through with the mental health team, talked to me about 4 times then put bipolar, OCD & PTSD on my benefit forms. That's far more accurate, in my opinion, than the BPD the mental health team were leaning towards, after a year. X

Support workers in the UK can't really diagnose though so shouldn't be putting that on any forms!

Is the charity MIND by any chance?

Bourbon