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Postby Kheo Dofh » Sat Sep 03, 2011 4:20 pm

Onebravegirl recommanded I post this here. Don't know why though, I have three personnalities with one idendity. Not multiple identities

After over an hour of instigation, I discovered I was stuck with triple personnalities for the rest of my life.

I don't have the motivation required to merge the personnalities so->
I would need external help to work up that motivation but->
My brain as already assimilated too many asocial elements to be able get an outside help which means->
I would need to work up my motivation to get rid of those but->
I already spend my entire willpower in the morning just to get up causing Î

And the reason I got that in the first place was because my original personnality was too emotionnal and fragile. And 8 years later, nothing changed.
Me (Eve) - 17 - Female - Taciturn night owl - Depression, SPD
I (Ǝvɘ) - 17 - Male - Demonic doomsbringer - ASPD, sadism
Myself (Mentlegan) - ??? - Male - Cynical narcissist - arcissism, megalomania
The Core (727 Paranoid Encore) - ??? - Asexual - Realist mastermind - Paranoia[/color]
Kheo Dofh
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Re: .

Postby sev0n » Sat Sep 03, 2011 4:50 pm

How exactly do you experience all 3 parts of you?


I hope some part of you gives in and sees a therapist. I can honestly say doing that was one of the hardest things I ever did. Asking for help! Its not easy.
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Re: .

Postby Kheo Dofh » Sat Sep 03, 2011 4:59 pm

I experience "them" as three different personnalities, all active at the same time, with overlaping thoughts and different reactions to real world stimulis.

:( But I don't trust the rapists.
Me (Eve) - 17 - Female - Taciturn night owl - Depression, SPD
I (Ǝvɘ) - 17 - Male - Demonic doomsbringer - ASPD, sadism
Myself (Mentlegan) - ??? - Male - Cynical narcissist - arcissism, megalomania
The Core (727 Paranoid Encore) - ??? - Asexual - Realist mastermind - Paranoia[/color]
Kheo Dofh
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Re: .

Postby Aecy » Sat Sep 03, 2011 5:15 pm

Kheo Dofh wrote:I experience "them" as three different personnalities, all active at the same time, with overlaping thoughts and different reactions to real world stimulis.

:( But I don't trust the rapists.

I can relate.

We're all ourselves but not each other in this brain.
Though not everyone is out at one time. But there are usually enough that are partially aware and pick up necessary information to keep some sort of continuity of awareness.

You don't have to trust them to get help from them. Most of me doesn't trust anybody, psych included. But if she can help me figure out how to fix crap, then I'm willing to go and try and do what I can about it.

Also, remember. They're literally not allowed, legally, to tell anybody about what you tell them unless they believe you're going to hurt somebody or commit a serious crime, so it's an interaction where you don't have to worry at ALL about them repeating what you say or anything of that sort.

Dunno if that helps you, but I have issues with that so it helps me.
I'd prefer to simply not worry about identities.
We're each me, yet not each other. We work together and share information; we're quite co-conscious.

The "three sections/three gatekeepers" theory is holding.
Don't listen too closely to Ned. He thinks too hard. [OCD]
He tends to see only what he expects to see.
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Re: .

Postby Kheo Dofh » Sat Sep 03, 2011 5:30 pm

Aecy wrote:We're all ourselves but not each other in this brain.
Though not everyone is out at one time. But there are usually enough that are partially aware and pick up necessary information to keep some sort of continuity of awareness.


The personnalties have the same identity.

Funny thing: The "original" personnality is the least active one.

Aecy wrote:You don't have to trust them to get help from them. Most of me doesn't trust anybody, psych included. But if she can help me figure out how to fix crap, then I'm willing to go and try and do what I can about it.

I'm not torn, I'm 100% untrusting of anyone.

Aecy wrote:Also, remember. They're literally not allowed, legally, to tell anybody about what you tell them unless they believe you're going to hurt somebody or commit a serious crime, so it's an interaction where you don't have to worry at ALL about them repeating what you say or anything of that sort.

And that's supposed to comfort me how? A.D.I.D.A.M.
Me (Eve) - 17 - Female - Taciturn night owl - Depression, SPD
I (Ǝvɘ) - 17 - Male - Demonic doomsbringer - ASPD, sadism
Myself (Mentlegan) - ??? - Male - Cynical narcissist - arcissism, megalomania
The Core (727 Paranoid Encore) - ??? - Asexual - Realist mastermind - Paranoia[/color]
Kheo Dofh
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Re: .

Postby sev0n » Sat Sep 03, 2011 5:50 pm

Kheo Dofh wrote:We're all ourselves but not each other in this brain.
Though not everyone is out at one time. But there are usually enough that are partially aware and pick up necessary information to keep some sort of continuity of awareness.


The personalities have the same identity.

Funny thing: The "original" personality is the least active one.

This is common in DID. It's often called your Apparently Normal Parts. These parts can all go by the exact same name and appear the same, but different ones will handle different situations. I am not a therapist, but its possible this is what you are dealing with.

Emotional Parts, which may not surface can also influence you from inside.

Reading and knowledge is the best thing you can do for yourself besides therapy, and I actually get a lot more of out reading myself, but having a therapist to deny or confirm my ideas is ideal.

Sipra has a book out that I think might help you.
Treating DID
http://www.amazon.com/Treating-Dissocia ... tm_title_1

The book does not just explain DID like most, but goes into far more. The 2 editors have an outstanding understanding of DID. If you like more technical books, E. Howells book has the most up to date information including the ANP issue you might have.

http://www.amazon.com/Understanding-Tre ... tm_title_2

Actually the chapter where she deals with ANP is online. I will dig it up for you.
http://docs.google.com/viewer?a=v&q=cac ... WKJg&pli=1


I don't trust either, although I have learned to fake it well. I prefer to spend all my time alone, but I went and had 5 kids so that does not work. I try hard to deal with those issues.
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Re: .

Postby Kheo Dofh » Sat Sep 03, 2011 6:20 pm

Well, apart from the APN, I have no other alters. I haven't experience any major memory losses or conciousness loss
Me (Eve) - 17 - Female - Taciturn night owl - Depression, SPD
I (Ǝvɘ) - 17 - Male - Demonic doomsbringer - ASPD, sadism
Myself (Mentlegan) - ??? - Male - Cynical narcissist - arcissism, megalomania
The Core (727 Paranoid Encore) - ??? - Asexual - Realist mastermind - Paranoia[/color]
Kheo Dofh
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Posts: 330
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Local time: Wed Aug 06, 2025 12:31 pm
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Re: .

Postby sev0n » Sat Sep 03, 2011 6:32 pm

Kheo Dofh wrote:Well, apart from the ANP, I have no other alters. I haven't experience any major memory losses or consciousness loss


It is not always obvious. Loosing time is extremely hard to know because your brain will work hard to cover this up from you.

Were you abused as a child?

If you have 3 distinct parts that are as you describe them, that to me is an extreme case of DID. You don't have to know you have the emotional parts to have them. It's actually far more common for people to be aware of the emotional parts rather than the 3 distinct Apparently Normal Parts you may have.

Again, I am not a therapist and it could be other things. It's just if you do have DID this is how I would think of you having it.

There are so many other things out there and sadly I only know about DID.
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Re: .

Postby Kheo Dofh » Sat Sep 03, 2011 6:50 pm

tylas wrote:It is not always obvious. Loosing time is extremely hard to know because your brain will work hard to cover this up from you.

Yeah, but in a general manner, the only time where it has any chance of doing something like that is when I'm trying to sleep. Else I know there something happenning

tylas wrote:Were you abused as a child?

Physically, emotionnally or sexually? Because yes the first two.

tylas wrote:If you have 3 distinct parts that are as you describe them, that to me is an extreme case of DID. You don't have to know you have the emotional parts to have them. It's actually far more common for people to be aware of the emotional parts rather than the 3 distinct Apparently Normal Parts you may have.

Again, I am not a therapist and it could be other things. It's just if you do have DID this is how I would think of you having it.

"the emotional parts" You keep saying that, but you never clarified what you meant

tylas wrote:There are so many other things out there and sadly I only know about DID.
I know about PDs... Apart form that, #######2 don't know $#%^
Me (Eve) - 17 - Female - Taciturn night owl - Depression, SPD
I (Ǝvɘ) - 17 - Male - Demonic doomsbringer - ASPD, sadism
Myself (Mentlegan) - ??? - Male - Cynical narcissist - arcissism, megalomania
The Core (727 Paranoid Encore) - ??? - Asexual - Realist mastermind - Paranoia[/color]
Kheo Dofh
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Posts: 330
Joined: Fri Sep 02, 2011 10:45 pm
Local time: Wed Aug 06, 2025 12:31 pm
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Re: .

Postby sev0n » Sat Sep 03, 2011 7:05 pm

That's a lot to explain in a short space. That chapter I posted explains it well, but its still hard to digest and E. Howell likes her big words.

Basically look at my signature. I have several parts. Most are children. Those are my emotional parts. They formed at the ages I was abused so basically until age 12. One part can only handle so much abuse, so more parts can form to handle more. I was sexually, physically and emotionally abused from a newborn until I moved out at 12 years old and was abused by both parents and a brother.

Tylas1 (me) and tylas 2 are my Apparently Normal Parts. They appear exactly the same. They answer to the same name, but each handles different things. We switch all day long and loose time when we do this, but that time loss is not obvious because our brain makes up something for the lost time. Most of the time for us its brief.

Apparently Normal Parts -
Tylas1 is totally unemotional, does not want or need a man and can handle just about anything. She numbs out to stress and emotion.
tylas2 is an emotional mess - needy, clingy, extremely sexual, passionate, driven, etc.... Both work together to raise kids. No numbing here.

Emotional Child parts can influence what I do without taking FULL control of my body. Most have PTSD and I cannot stop their convulsions and jumping and such. This makes it all very complicated. I rarely get angry (instead numb out) but I can in a split second injure ADULTS (who deserve it) and I have been arrested many times for this. I don't think this is my ANP's, but there might be one I do not know of yet which does make sense. My physical body is the body builder type. I am extremely strong and fit and have no fear of fighting anyone. I did this just so I would never have to fear. I HATE fear! No one should have to feel it.

As I said, knowing of an ANP is NOT usually an easy thing for someone with DID. Knowing of EP's is easy. You seem opposite, so I don't know? You are different from most that come here and ask. I usually avoid the questions but I know few here understand how the ANP part of DID works so I am attempting to help.

Other things you mentioned...
--- While DID is usually caused from sexual abuse from a caretaker/parent it is not always the case.
----My EP's are quite active when I am sleeping. I don't think I loose time when they are out though.

Question:
Are you saying all 3 of your parts are out at once? Or do you feel like you are watching while another is out? How do you feel it? Try and pay attention to details and as much as you can.

For my ANP's I don't know when they are out. I loose that time.
For my EP's we are usually, but not always co-present. These are little ones that need TLC and lots of love.
Last edited by sev0n on Sat Sep 03, 2011 7:25 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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