Falling in Love & DID

I can imagine it getting pretty intense if you both have DID, but it's good to hear that you can sense when you both need to ground yourselves; that's always a good thing to notice.

It is quite intense, but that's also because we both have BPD, depression, PTSD and are both recovered from eating disorders. We're both praying and hoping that we can bring our child up in a way that minimises her chances of getting anything from us, or having anything made worse by us.

As for someone who doesn't have DID, how do you deal with being romantically and physically involved with the "host" ((haha minerva doesn't like that word...)) but anyways would i treat his/her alters like sister and brother-in-laws? What would happen if another alter surfaces and wants to be physical with me. If you don't realize it would that cause issues?

This is another part of how mine and my hubby's story is a bit unique (from what I've heard of others with DID). Obviously I'm romantically and physically involved with him, but then two of my female alters and two of his male alters are also couples.

As for the rest of those in the system, we've all formed different relationships. His only little calls one of my alters mum, and the rest of us are more like close friends or aunties and uncles to her. One of my littles calls my husband dad, another calls him brother.

When it comes to a physical relationship with alters other then the one you are dating, that's something that needs to be talked over between you and your partner. I know a lot of hosts don't like the idea, and like it even less in practice, but over time it's something that everyone can get used to. For my system, provided other alters don't get all the physical time, I don't mind them and my husband doing anything together. I'd rather they take care of those desires at home, with my husband, then going out and finding someone else who will do it with them instead.

Haha, yeah, that works too.


And yes, my puppies are dogs now though. Look what happens when you go off to college. Golden retriever and a chocolate lab, 5 and 6 years. I forgot how big they got XD I remember when we got them they were soooooooo little XD

jsilver wrote:As for someone who doesn't have DID, how do you deal with being romantically and physically involved with the "host" ((haha minerva doesn't like that word...)) but anyways would i treat his/her alters like sister and brother-in-laws? What would happen if another alter surfaces and wants to be physical with me. If you don't realize it would that cause issues?

Well I am in a unique situation where I am not only in love with the Core/Host but also with her 3 alters and them with me. So I basically have 4 GF's. They have very strict rules and it's only because the Core allows them, that I can be with them. Sure they get jealous or each other but I try to spend an equal amount of time with all of them. There's only 1 alter that is really active and the other two mostly only show up when I ask them out. Although they are always present and listening. I do certain things with all of them and I do things with them individually. I need to not think about it too much but just go with it otherwise it would make me feel bad myself. So far it's been working great for us. What the rules are they have internally I don't know but how they deal with it, is for them to figure out.