Confused! or am I? (possible trigger, not sure, doubt it)

Sorry about the part near the end. That was Seventeen wanting to chime in. She'll have you know she's the "cool" one. Horrible mouth! Ugh gotta love her. She gets us in the most trouble. But keeps us safe although bails if the going gets really tough. She seriously swears like every other word but all in good fun. She just wants to have fun.

This is the first time I have ever said all this. It is scary but very freeing. Is that a word?

Anyways. .. thanks to everyone who has responded. It means a lot and makes me feel less isolated.
Peace to all.
~Jennifer

No problem. Anytime you wanna talk, we're here for you.

-Christina

jennjenn wrote:I'm really trying... I think it may be someone's job to deny. Gonna work on that. Someone believes its imperative in keeping us safe. Keeping it secret, to the point of facilitating cooperation to hide it... make any sense??

Yeah, that makes sense. They won't want anyone to know, if they think there's some danger in people knowing. I've heard hiding it is necessary early on, since the main is usually still around whoever caused them to split in the first place. Something like that. As they feel safer, alters make themselves more known

jennjenn wrote:I have promised never to ignore and asked for them to speak clearly to me more often. Great idea.

jennjenn wrote:Oh I was so heartbroken telling buni about throwing it away, I promised right then she could get a new one. Any one she likes!

Good

jennjenn wrote:Sorry about the part near the end. That was Seventeen wanting to chime in. She'll have you know she's the "cool" one. Horrible mouth! Ugh gotta love her. She gets us in the most trouble. But keeps us safe although bails if the going gets really tough. She seriously swears like every other word but all in good fun. She just wants to have fun.

Nice to meet you, Seventeen
Alters talk regularly, around here, so they are welcome to do that, as long as they don't break any forum rules
Alters will usually put their name at the end of their post, so we know who said what. Some mains/cores put their name at the end too, but most don't.

jennjenn wrote:This is the first time I have ever said all this. It is scary but very freeing. Is that a word?

I think so

Just wanted to take a moment and say thanks so much for the support.

Things are very "busy" and quite a lot is going on. I'm being given insight on some issues... Last night was very active and I gained some knowledge and pleaded that I be able to keep it. It was gone this morning but throughout the day slowly creeping back in... At least this time I knew there was something to remember, just not what it was ...

I feel like I should be writing down everything I find out so if it all (they) disappears again, I have proof and it will be harder to fall into denial mode.

But I am so scared of someone finding my journal and judging me. It's happened before and have still not recovered from the breach of privacy. I have it hidden and have sent out an internal msg of where it is, etc... May start an online journal. Trying to convince others it's safe to write is difficult.

Thanks for letting me think outloud
Hope everyones day is bright and beautiful.
~Jennifer

Yeah, I think writing things down would be a good idea... especially the things you might forget. Some people also write/type out a list, consisting of: the name of each alter (or a basic description, if you don't know it... like "the angry one"), a description of them, their age, etc.

I'm sorry someone read your journal without your permission