Too much tornado.

The only way I think I can describe my system at the current moment.... is to reference to the movie Alvin and the Chipmunks... when they drink the coffee and bounce off the walls and go crazy for 5 seconds then completely crash and fall asleep.
Things are falling apart and have been I know I'm not helping either... by telling everyone to disappear... but I'm sooo worried of switching in public... and people noticing.... I'm tired of feeling like a walking public transportation bus.... if that makes any sense. And what irritates me the most lately... is every little decision I try to make gets ruined.... example... going to church or not... I'll decide to go... and we'll get there... and then everything goes down the drain... the littles want to sing the itsy bitsy spider and go explore the microphones on the stage behind the pastor... and the teens want to scream above everyone obsene things and the adults just want to leave. One of my adults doesn't understand why I believe what I do.... and so I've got religions differences that complicate what we do or don't do.
Also things like SSI.... my SSI is pending... and I think it's the only realistic solution for now... until I can get a therapist who understands and hopefully make some progress... but the adults tell me that's a 'wimpy person's crutch' (lamens terms with obsene words edited out)
Nightmares have escalated sooo high I'm terrified to sleep... even if it's just drifting off for a sec.
And I'm losing an average of 9 hours a day currently.....
Everything is in shambles... and I can't make time for it. I'm on state assistance for now until I can get somewhere with my SSI claim .... and that's another worry of mine... is how much if any do I think I should share with my worker there.

I also had my thyroid removed in oct and the rest removed in Jan due to thyroid cancer... so trying to figure out fatigue issues has bacome a problem as well... with the possibility of maybe needing to up my hormones or up my Prozac.... or just tired?

I'm sorry... just needed to vent... I'm sooo frustrated and tired of not having anyone to talk to on a regular basis.

theforgottenones wrote:I also had my thyroid removed in oct and the rest removed in Jan due to thyroid cancer... so trying to figure out fatigue issues has bacome a problem as well... with the possibility of maybe needing to up my hormones or up my Prozac.... or just tired?

I regret that I can't offer any advice on the other stuff you write about, but having your thyroid removed would *definitely* cause fatigue issues. Part of what the thyroid gland does is to produce a hormone, Thyroxine, which regulates metabolic rate among other things. It also needs iodine to do this, but generally you should get enough of that from iodised table salt and if you've had your thyroid removed then I guess that wouldn't matter anyway.

(My son was born with a central midline defect, basically stuff along the middle of his head didn't form right, and he didn't have a working thyroid or pituitary gland. While he was alive we had to give him regular injections of 'thyroid hormone' to make sure his body responded to stress. Without it he just slept all the time, didn't get stressed even when he really should have, like right after surgery.)