Trying to figure this out

Hi- this is my first post on this forum. I found it looking for some place to talk about this disorder other than social media (although this might still count as social media? I don't know where forums fall on the spectrum. Anyways- not relevant).

I've been diagnosed with DID for three years now, and was recently diagnosed again after an inpatient stay when a trauma and dissociation PHP triggered a part that couldn't keep herself safe. I know all of this logically, along with everything prior to about three months ago- like I read about my whole life in a book, and the person I was was the protagonist, and I was watching them go about the motions. A lot of things I just don't remember. And when I try to connect to who I'm supposed to be- let's call them "E", the person I've mostly been for the past four years, they feel completely foreign, and I can't even firgure out what it would mean to be E. Which is ridiculous, because they're me, but they feel like some separate severed version of me I can't grab hold of.

Instead, for the past few months it's like I've been steadily going from feeling like I'm absolutely nobody, barely even a shard of a person, to someone who has more of a sense of self- but it's not the self I'm supposed to have, it's different. I know- logically, again- that this is what's happened to me my whole life. Something awful happens, the version of me that experienced it "dies", and a new self takes over, and the old selves take over sometimes still. Logically, it happened again. But nothing terrible happened, just a low-level stress and generally feeling unsafe constantly for a few months. Not anywhere near what's caused this before, and nowhere near traumatic.

All in all, I'm functioning well. I don't necessarily think of myself as a person right now, because I don't really want to be, but I have hobbies, I'm cooking food, I'm getting things done and doing well at work. Hearing people call me E's name makes me flinch and second-guess myself and makes my heart skip a beat, so I wish I could start going by a different name, but other than that everything is fine.

I don't know if this is how other people experience DID, if I'm a "new part" that formed/fractured off and am now in charge of this life, or what to think about this, if it's an intense, months-long depersonalization episode that will eventually end, I don't really know anything. I tried telling my therapist but she changed the subject to general grounding skills, and the issue is that I can ground, but not to E, only to myself.

I would love any advice!

Anyways- nice to join the forum.