How can I stop holding alters back?

I have now realized that as a host Toni I have prevented alters to ever trully fronting by limiting their goals, ways, behavior. I have co-consciousness with every alter, and experiencing them living so differently from how I as host would live makes me terrified. I think it will benefit me if I let alters live more freely, but I struggle to let that happen, even though I accept them as also me but different me.