pretending

pretending...is it lying?

today a friend came by, havent seen him in half a year. so i open my front door when i hear knocking and i see someone who recognizes me but i dont recognize him. well i do and i dont.

its become a ritual now to take a picture of every person i know and i have this little book, i put everyones picture in there along wiht a paragraph long description of how i know them. being the recluse i am i pretty much only have 50 pictures in there, but its a daily ritual to open it up and just glance through, each one i dont remember i read up on, and then read how its connected to the others. so today i remembered him from the picture and paragraph, but i didnt remember him from actual memories, he doesnt know im DID so i just played along like i knew him and things turned out well for his visit....but im pretending to know him, is that as bad as lying to him?


and yes my journaling combined with this old book of mine is pretty much the only way i remain a member of humanity my internal memory mechanisms may be broken but that wont stop me from using external ones eh?

i Think that is awesome! Liz made us a picture journal for the lilttlles who cannot readf and for some of the others who dont remember whats going on when she isnt here. and for big amber to know whats goin gon too.
its not lying. its protecting yourself. thats good. that you made something to help yourself out.

that is a GREAT idea, John!!! i think i'll try it. man, i know what you mean about functioning in the outside world. your idea should help a lot! many thanks.

benny

It's not lying, it's using the method that's safest for you. Of course you aren't completely honest in avoiding trouble, but not all people out there will understand and you can make your own choices in your circle of friends. There are people out there who feel fervently on it being something similar to 'living a lie', and feel at their best when everyone around them knows exactly what's wrong no matter what they think or feel about it, and there are people who feel at their best not divulging this personal information about them to those they do not have a close, personal relationship with. If this way makes you feel the best, then it's the most perfect way there is, and you definitely shouldn't worry about it being similar to lying.