Really need some advice

Welcome to the forum Tasty1. I am very sorry to hear that you and your GF are facing this.

Tasty1 wrote:
1. is it common or normal for the alter to be coherent of everything while she is awake but not the host?

Very common. As Alters present they all have different levels of communication and interaction with each other and the Host. Some Alters may let the Host remain passively aware of everything that is happening while other Alters may shut the Host out completely.

Tasty1 wrote:2. Is there any possibility of the host going away and maybe not ever come back?

Over the years, Hosts can change. It's unlikely that a developed personality (Host) would disappear completely. They may step aside for another Alter and become very quiet, even dormant, but their personality has been created and will remain.

Tasty1 wrote:3. lately the host is starting to be able to access memories from the alter, not many and very random things, is that common and what shall i expect in the future?

Again it depends on the relationship between the Host and the Alter. In our experience though, even if the Alter intensely dislikes the Host, there is always some 'bleeding across' of memories.

Tasty1 wrote:4. can the two parts ever become one again?

The T's call this Integration, either partial or complete. To them it's the ultimate aim of therapy and recovery. Some users on the forum have successfully integrated Alters but it's more common that the Alters's personalities develop themselves more fully as they present more often and interact with the world around them.

Tasty1 wrote:5. is there actually two people in one body or is it one person whose mind is so fractured that they think they are two different people.

There's no answer to that yet. Ask a Neuroscientist and they'll insist that it's a single neuronal system fractured to such an extent that it's a single person who presents with two or more coherent personality traits which are so different that that they appear as different individuals. But to each Alter they are individuals with their own memories, desires, reactions and responses. Each Alter has a unique reality which they participate in and which must be recognized and validated.

First, do no harm... Brett

Thank you all for your replies and V2 I do apologize as I didnt realize the thread went to another page and I just didnt see your response when I asked if anyone had any input on this subject.

Ok just for the record I do fully understand and accept them as two different personalities but I guess im just more used to my girlfriends original personality than her other part since the other part was for the most part dormant for the first few months that we have been together. I love both her parts but I think I do like my girlfriends original personality over her other half but thats not to say that i dont still love them both because i do. I guess her other part and I butt heads more than the first half and thats why I feel that way but I do love them and I do recognize them as individuals its just not always easy to actually live with that in that way and what i mean by that is like when her other half and I butt heads its not easy to not take it out on her other half because they after all look and act almost in the same manner so thats the hardest obstacle for me to overcome. Im just worried im gonna lose what I know to be the personality of my girlfriend although they both technically are my girlfriend. The problems we are all facing now is the fact that her first half or as i refer to as the original personality can no longer wake herself up anymore and basically can sleep for very long periods of time and her second half has no problems waking herself up and doing the day to day routines while the first half sleeps. We are all worried that one day soon I wont even be bale to wake her and she will be lost or trapped in whatever sleep state she seems to be in most of the time. I just dont want to lose her yet and I feel like thats what is happening more and more every day. And im scared for our relationship I have with her and not as much with her second part and im afraid the relationship may be doomed if her first half doesnt come back. There just seems to be way to many if's and not knowing the future scares me and i hope thats normal to feel that way.

But seriously thank you all for helping me along with these issues because I really have no one else to turn to.