most interesting paper dissociation and attachment style (!)

This paper just kicks some serious donkey ass.
It's a bit too long and triggerworthy but it's the best thing happened to me in my life. Hopefully I don't forget about it altogether by tomorrow.
It's about attachment disorder, moms, and how DID is probably less related to classical traumatic events and more to a disorganized attachment style. And as ever, it's the parents fault (who'd think THAT?)
Reading this was like reading a case report on my whole damn life, although it's neither a case report nor does it talk much about trauma.
I invite you to read it. Whoever manages to read it to the end first is the winner
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2625289/

Hi Omid,

Wow! This paper articulates something I've been thinking about for a while—that disorganized attachment can "stand in for" protracted traumatic experience.

I felt not only a rational response (as written above), but also an emotional response, because I realized that what is described in this article probably applies to me. I also found myself relating to the specific examples. It's so unfortunate that children are being put into these positions where they have to dissociate their own lives and needs to receive attachment and care. I say this knowing that I was probably in the same position.

It definitely explains one of the factors for my dissociative symptoms. And likely one of the factors for many others.

Thanks for sharing!

Thanks for sharing!

Omid wrote:Reading this was like reading a case report on my whole damn life, although it's neither a case report nor does it talk much about trauma.

Can totally relate!

I found these paragraphs really helpfull.

"
Therefore, the “quieter” caregiving deviations such as withdrawing from emotional contact, being unresponsive to the child’s overtures, or displaying contradictory, role-reversed, or disoriented responses when the infant’s attachment needs are heightened appear to be the maternal responses most implicated in pathways toward dissociation."

"Main and Hesse [10] further theorized that when the parent appears frightened in his or her interactions with the infant, the infant may infer that there is something threatening in the environment that should be feared. Although such a perceived environmental threat would lead a securely attached infant to approach his parent for protection, a frightened parent may communicate apprehension to the child. Under these conditions, the infant may sense the helplessness of the parent in the face of threat and demonstrate conflict about approaching him or her for protection by displaying contradictory simultaneous or sequential approach-avoidance behaviors typical of disorganized detachment. Alternatively, the parent’s frightened stance may cause the child to infer that he, himself, is frightening the parent, again leading to conflict in approaching and further threatening an already frightened parent. Lyons-Ruth and colleagues [11, 12] demonstrated that parental withdrawal from the infant’s attachment overtures at times of infant arousal is also associated with infant disorganization, whether or not the parent’s behavior is directly frightened or frightening to the infant. Thus, the infant’s internalization of contradictory models of the self as frightened or threatening and of the parent as hostile or helpless/withdrawing can be conceptualized in terms of contradictory models that generate incompatible behavioral and mental tendencies. This primary lack of integration around basic strategies for seeking comfort and protection under stress is what Liotti [9] suggested may confer vulnerability to dissociative processes later in life."

This whole paper describes my life. But the most pronounced thing I can painfully relate to is this damn Role-Reversal. It's always been that way. I'm literally the parent of my parents and sister. My sister even says that directly. And given how full of s**t I am, I'm wondering how they must feel, having such a crappy parent (which is me)

This paper gave me a lot of insight! I really liked it! I had trouble trying to identify where role reversal was in my life the best i did was rather than take care of them i just took care of myself. (Close enough?)
Thank you for the paper though it was really helpful

Thank you very much for the link. The most correlated factor in DID is not trauma but disorganized attachment to the mother (which is very traumatic in itself.) I remember being ignored or punished when I'm crying out to be comforted, that literally broke me to pieces.

Thanks Omid. I think I read this years ago and forgot about to so I super appreciate seeing the link again.

Attachment clearly underlies our condition, and continues to interfere with therapy, with relationships and attachments within. It is hard work to improve attachment issues. I have been lucky to have two therapists who understand the boundaries and limitations of attachment to a therapist, but this has been extremely difficult for us to manage (and painful).

it makes me very sad.

Hi all,

Coming back to this with another observation. In the paper linked in the original post, it's stated that the way a parent soothes their child is woven into the fabric of their identity and coping skills. So if a parent fails to soothe their child as outlined in the paper (responding with hostility/helplessness), the child will grow up with less coping skills for real life situations and chronic stress (increased/unusual cortisol levels). This chronic stress could also play a role in the trauma that predicates dissociative coping methods/dissociative disorders. Being overwhelmed by real life situations, or having other unusual responses to real life situations—and the following reactions from others who see that response—can be stressful or even traumatic, especially if a child already doesn't have skills to cope or regulate their emotions.

Just something that I realized I missed on the first reading.