Lost my job! What now?

I was dismissed from my job because the company doesn't have money to maintain an extra employee who is being trained. I was exchanged for someone with 10 years plus of experience. This makes me sad, it was the breaking of the agreement I had with my boss. Now I have no escape, my mom has also removed all my technologies between the hours of 2:00pm and 8:00pm. Now I can't game, or watch animes or produce music. This is unfair and depressing. In the mornings I go to class, which I dislike. At 9:00pm I go to sleep because my medicines make me horribly sleepy and unfunctional. I need time to rest, and I don't have it now. I'm thinking of getting another job just so I won't be home during the day, but I'll finish school in December and plan on going on a cruise. But I don't wanna suffer at home for another 2 months. I wanna die, I'm going crazy. My mom is making things worse. It's a hard time my alters and I are going through. The system is having a breakdown, switching is occurring every half hour at least. I just took 100mg of my medicine (Olanzapine). It's not enough to kill (300mg is enough), but it will be enough to make me sleep for the past few days. At least it's something.

-Pepper

Why the no-technologies rule from 2Pm to 8PM? That seems kind of arbitrary to me. The time frame doesn't seem to be in an effort to like, help with a healthy sleep cycle or anything, for example. No technology after 9PM, as an example, would make sense to help a teenagers get to sleep at a healthy time. But 2PM to 8PM seems random as heck.

I am also wondering (only if you don't mind sharing), how old is your physical body? If you're older (like 17+) honestly I'd say F it and just entertain yourself, regardless.

It blows my mind looking back and realizing how long I was yielding and submissive to my mother's occasional madness into my own adulthood, like it didn't occur to me that I didn't have to follow her arbitrary rules anymore.

Of course I'm not talking about respect and so on, that stuff is just a given. I just remember things like my mother telling me what careers I was 'allowed' to have, and me actually taking that seriously. I just want to go back in time and face-palm myself.

CopperMoon wrote:Why the no-technologies rule from 2Pm to 8PM? That seems kind of arbitrary to me. The time frame doesn't seem to be in an effort to like, help with a healthy sleep cycle or anything, for example. No technology after 9PM, as an example, would make sense to help a teenagers get to sleep at a healthy time. But 2PM to 8PM seems random as heck.

I am also wondering (only if you don't mind sharing), how old is your physical body? If you're older (like 17+) honestly I'd say F it and just entertain yourself, regardless.

It blows my mind looking back and realizing how long I was yielding and submissive to my mother's occasional madness into my own adulthood, like it didn't occur to me that I didn't have to follow her arbitrary rules anymore.

Of course I'm not talking about respect and so on, that stuff is just a given. I just remember things like my mother telling me what careers I was 'allowed' to have, and me actually taking that seriously. I just want to go back in time and face-palm myself.

She didn't tell me why that rule exists now. It's a stupid rule. The body is 19.

Rules are rules, aren't they? Mom is always right, even when she's wrong. There's no point not following her rules, it'll just make things worse.

She can get kinda bossy, telling me not to allow time out for my alters or not doing somethings they want.

Now she has decided that I'm too young to have a vacation and she wants me to get a job soon and go to college next year. I need time to breathe and I'm not allowed to have it. I'm depressed and so are my alters, the littles aren't sleeping at night and the teenagers are self harming. I feel like begging my therapists to put me in a mental hospital just so I can take a break from things. Mom won't allow me breaks, cause I'm too young for breaks.

-Pepper

Hi Pepper,

Getting to listen to yourself, and to your body are two powerful tools you can always use. It's a shame the mother don't get it. The fact you know how the littles are feeling, and the teens are feeling as well is powerful. I hope you get to find ways to care for yourselves and all your needs. Remember, that even if external circumstances seem to be closing off, no job, difficult relation with the mother, having no breaks; there are always places, and spaces to reach. This one, the therapist, everyone in your system, internal meetings at night, talking to each other, you guys are already very creative.

Everyone needs breaks. We need breaks to think, to rest, to make good choices, to feel better.

I'm sending positive vibes wishing things do get better for all of you.

Sea

Seangel wrote:Hi Pepper,

Getting to listen to yourself, and to your body are two powerful tools you can always use. It's a shame the mother don't get it. The fact you know how the littles are feeling, and the teens are feeling as well is powerful. I hope you get to find ways to care for yourselves and all your needs. Remember, that even if external circumstances seem to be closing off, no job, difficult relation with the mother, having no breaks; there are always places, and spaces to reach. This one, the therapist, everyone in your system, internal meetings at night, talking to each other, you guys are already very creative.

Everyone needs breaks. We need breaks to think, to rest, to make good choices, to feel better.

I'm sending positive vibes wishing things do get better for all of you.

Sea

Hello Seangel,

It's just so hard, communication with the alters a lot of times is difficult. And mom makes things harder. I wish we could escape for a month, away from everything.

Thank you for the vibes and wishful thinking!! We appreciate it!

-Pepper

Yeah, it does suck that you mother doesn't help. :/

Pepper, your name reminds me of something I saw:

https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/ ... 7699_o.jpg



Sea

Seangel wrote:Yeah, it does suck that you mother doesn't help. :/

Pepper, your name reminds me of something I saw:

https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/ ... 7699_o.jpg



Sea

OMG, this is too funny! That hashtag though

Thanks for sharing this! It made my day lol

-Pepper

hahaha I'm glad to read it.

Sea