newly diagnosed and scared

i guess thats true for me i was shy and good but i ended up doing some bad stuff i guess. I think it is really hard to know who you are which bit i really am what i really like. I think i have more trouble with my dissasociation than my alters they come around not all the time but i sit in the car and you nearly have an accident and you think what if im just imagining all this what if we actually crashed and im just imagining everything is still normal and im going to wake up in hospital three weeks later, its hard going through life not knowing whats real and whats not if anything!

I really recognize the dream-state. I live in it 24/7. Am I real, is the world surrounding me real, could it be that I'm dreaming my life, and so on.. It's hard.

Take care

HI EVERYONE,

I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN! "AM I ALIVE?" "IS LIVE REAL?" "IS TIME REAL?" SOMETIMES I'M AFRAID I'M LOSING MY MIND. MY T. SAID D.I.D. IS NOT A PSYCOSIS, OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT, AND DIDN'T LEAD TO INSANITY. MAN I HOPE HE'S RIGHT!

I GET THESE REALLY WEIRD FEELINGS ABOUT TIME. I REMEMBER USING TIME TO "HANG IN THERE" WHEN THE ABUSE WAS STILL GOING ON. I WOULD THINK OF SOMETHING I COULD LOOK FOREWARD TO IN THE FUTURE, AND WISH MYSELF THERE. NOW, I FEEL LIKE IT'S ALWAYS NOW, IT'S "HERE" WHERE EVER I AM, AND WHOEVER I AM, I'M ME. IT DOESN'T FEEL THAT WAY, BUT IT HELPS ME FROM FREAKING OUT IN PUBLIC.

ANYBODY HAVE ANY AMBARASSING PUBLIC FREAK OUT STORIES?

BENNY

im glad its not just me! sometimes i feel so sureal i think im going to pass out thats how out of it i get!
This psychiatrist says that i need to decide whether i want to dredge myself through years of therapy discovering things that may be hard or i could just leave it stay the way i am, is that right? I cant keep doing this for any longer i need something to change yeah its good that i disociate rather than freaking out but my whole life not knowing whats real, if im real, who i am all the things i dont remember i cant believe he thinks i can do this for the rest of my life. I really feel brushed aside and im getting really depressed again i really dont know what to do any decision is going to be wrong i have until the 15 jan to decide i mean there is nothing i can do here that will be right i wish he could of told me i hadd to do one or the other. i just dont know how long i can hold out for

cant you just do stabilize, thats not into the past and all, but just some help for how to deal with life and getting to talk to insiders and making things better with parts can be done with stabilize-therapy, can you ask about that?

HEY Y'ALL,

IT'S POSSIBLE TO STABILIZE? ONE OF THE MAIN PROBLEMS WE HAVE ARE DIFFERENT ANSWERS TO ONE DISSION. EVERY TIME I HAVE TO MAKE A CHOICE, IT USUALLY ENDS UP BEING AN ARGUEMENT. IT HAPPENS A LOT. "I WANT TO DO THIS, NO I'D RATHER DO THIS, AIN'T NOWAY I'M DOING THAT, THINK OF SOMETHING ELSE." ON AND ON UNTIL I CAN'T TAKE ANY MORE, AND END UP DOING NOTHING.

CAN YOU RELATE, IF SO HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH IT?

CAN'T MAKE UP OUR MIND,
BENNY

i will ask about stablizing sounds the easiest way. I just cant help but want to know even tho i know the consequences could be awful i just dont know good job i got a while to decide! Did anyone else have to decide this?

Hi f_d and BENNY!
I have found a website that you both would find helpful. It describes steps to come to stabilization vs deep therapy (if you're not ready).
It is:
http://www.2multiples.com/twcrew/

I hope you do access it and find it helpful. Let me know, K?

Still having a rough time with school and work. Will post more later.

Cathi

hey it was a really good website but couldnt find the bit about stablization can anyone help???

i feel so sick thinking about all of this im worried and miserable and i dont know who to tell!