Freaking out... and super frustrated!!!

You know those days when you think its another day like its tuesday but you think its Wednesday... and you keep doing everything as if its wednesday...
Well I lost a lot of time. I lost 3 days this week due to "holidays" and I just came backlast night freaked out that it was Thursday and i didnt knwo where my week had gone or what I had done.
I thought it was still monday night. and I was getting ready for TUESDAY, laying out my work clothes when Liz asked "isnt it casual day tomorrow" but tomorrow is tuesday, as far as i know we are wearing business tomorrow... no tomorrow is friday... WHAT???
Oh man I havent lost that much time in a long time. Apparently, I had a sinus infection missed another day and a half of work, when I already missed monday, and just little everyday things...
Then Finally after the shock and acceptance of lost time... and getting reoriented. I was getting ready for bed and I had a horrible flashback followed by a panic attack that I couldnt get control of. Thank goodness Liz was there and grabbed a paperbag... it was bad. The anxiety didnt go away until 1am and i finally relaxed and fell asleep with Liz holding my hand. When I woke up to see my Psychiatrist today I had suck a migraine. I took my meds and went to see her... she tells me I can stick my anxiety meds under my tongue and it will work as quickly as the shot. OMG!!! why didnt you tell me that before??!!! all this time I could have made my anciety go away that much faster.
Ok so after a kind of tough session with her I leave and have to pay for parking only they dont except debit cards... so i have to go back in go to the bank take out money go back and the price of my ticket went up... GRRR fine... so now I have to go and try to find a gas station, a gas station that is possibly within my price range, but of course I am in the expensive part of the San Fernando Valley and the cheapest gas price is $3.40... so since I am running on fumes I suck it up and pay... get 4 gallons of gas for my left over $14 from my $6 parking... and try to go to work. So I go to work... finally I think no thinking... just cancelling... right as I am about to put on my headphones my supervisor calls me and tells me that HR wants a meeting with me about FMLA/VPA . "You are treading on thin ice here Amber" says the HR manager, we really need to get this figured out... "what is there to figure out" I scream in my head... "I am sick you dont care... you wont help me... whats the point anymore" But I say "I know... what can we do to fix this" so we have an hour long meeting about my leave and disability.. and finally after its all sorted out, I get to go back to my desk and not think. So here I am not thinking.. and venting... All of this is because of my DID... Sometimes I wish i was normal... but I know they protected me and they helped me... I love my alters, but I wish the rest of the world would understand... so frustrated...

Well, you certainly have more patience than me. I would've snapped at the assholes at work. And yes there is a way to do it without getting fired. Simply don't curse and don't sound like you're directing your anger at them, but just rather in general pissed off. Works like a charm. At least it does for me.

And if it will help cheer you up, on Tuesday, I thought it was Thursday up till Frank told me what day it was. And that wasn't until later that night at work.

I totally understand what you mean.. I just vented it in other post about my work... I can't function normally with guys around... grrrr. It made me worried about losing my job because of those PSTD triggers. It is REALLY frustrating It felt like tues/wed to me today, but it's saturday.... *sighs*

I have been worried lately about losing my job too. Cannot ADA help us. This is not fair that we have to worry about that on top of all of our other worries. I am so frustrated at the lack of support for mental disabilities! Just because you can't see it doesnt mean it isn't there, and there is no time limit on when I am going to get better. I wish it was as easy as a 12 week treatment to get me well again! MY GOD! "12 weeks isnt very much time, only 300 hours, so get yourself well, or well, we will cross that bridge when we get there... "
So sad...