New member in our system * possible trigger warning*

Before I begin, I am setting a trigger warning for this entire thread due to questions about demon children (I really hope I am using the correct word, apologies if not). Some members may find this topic disturbing, so please read with caution.













If anyone has read our last thread "Persecutor in our System" ( dissociative-identity/topic113794.html )then you will be generally up to date. Our newest member has emerged and shown us her actual form, as opposed to hosting off of other members in our system and she looks very similar to what I read about demons in other people's systems. Our other member, caged girl, also is of this type, although we do not know very much about her as we have no access to her at the moment due to her being sealed away for the time being. What I do not know is how to handle someone of this origin. I am at a complete loss and have absolutely no knowledge on the subject. If anyone has a similar type being in their system, any information would be welcome. I am sorry for the vagueness of this post, but i am not quite sure how to word what I wish to ask.

What causes a being like this to occur in a system?
How can we make her feel comfortable and welcome when she frightens other members?
Are disturbing behaviors common for this type of being?

If the answers to any of these questions are too sensitive or personal to write in forums, we are also open to PM's. Thank you for any help or clarity.

Well like we've said before, we have Gwar.

*possible triggers*

Gwar is demon-ish in nature though with a humanoid male form.
He's half-mad, sorta riding that grey area between rage, insanity and terror and easy to trigger.
We find him to be both predatory and self-destructive----it can take a very particular way to handle him because any attempt to manage or confront him results in him self-destructing or in attacking.
He will wait for when he senses weakness or fear or a certain environment and then he will go for the throat.
If we attempt to set boundaries he either self-mutilates and laughs or panicks/attacks in a rage.

A being like this, at least with us----occurs from becoming the scapegoat for the abuse/trauma and the emotions from it, left to sit and fester and build. When that happens the mind of the alter becomes twisted and poisoned. Normal values, wants, desires...none of it matters.
Gwar held all the panic/rage and vengeance for the trauma we suffered, and was sort of mutated and dehumanized due to it. Any sort of kindness, offerings of safety or peace etc trigger an attack.
A friend of ours described him as the River Styx personified. A huge swirling mass of lost souls, anger and pain that is so burdened by its own demons that it cannot pull itself out, so it becomes determined to destroy everything/all the light for everyone else around it.

As for what to do...I can't really help you there as we are in that stage right now.
As unfair as it is, it is imperative to keep your system safe and do not extend kindness to this new alter at the expense of everyone's safety. Get to know them, study them, but like any wild animal do make sure said alter is safely contained.
Do not be cruel, or unkind, but respect it for what it is and don't think you'll tame the bear simply by being nice so to speak.
We also set boundaries and safe zones with Gwar, places where he cannot go out of respect to others and what we will allow/not allow in the system. We give him opportunity/freedom to express himself and we acknowledge his feelings/wants/thoughts but we make sure he can't *act* on those, because he is a valued part of us.
We are working on expressing gratitude to him and acknowledging his sacrifices without frightening him or triggering aggression, and eventually hope to bring him into the fold, but we'll see.

YES, very common. Gwar does/enjoys things that disturb us. And enjoys our disturbed reactions.
Mutilation, dissection, torture, blood, sadism, masochism...he does it all.
Given his nature though its to be expected.
He frequently likes to terrorize or disturb us,

If it helps, we were told to think about what united us, which was trying to keep us safe/survive.
In that way, Gwar is just like us. Except that he seeks safety in ceasing to exist and by aligning himself with the 'darkness' or accepting that we were all the things we were told/felt etc so it can't hurt us.

Thank you, this was extremely helpful.

maybe this will trigger.

hi! i am bones!
i see two sides to this.
one is that we have djinni inside!
they are demons that are very ancient in the way they think and are disconnected from human and they usually take the form of animals.
like one is a white cat! another is a crow! another is a serpent.
the second side is that some of the kinderkin who are lost girls in the woods like me are kind of demons too but not the same way that djinni are demons!
xul is a lost girl and she is very enraged and feral.
she enjoys pain and blood and vengeance and chaos and madness and death and these sorts of things.
but where we are from those things are religious and are tied to respect!
so it is perspective because some might say she is a nasty huntress for hurting others or herself but to us she is repeating rituals and communing with spirit.
the djinni in our system are not bad entities either!
they are what we call guardian demons which is only half a joke!
of course they do not have halos but they are still powerful guardians!
dark beings are not always evil beings and some have no intention to harm you!
i think that is a human misconception or misunderstanding.
yes they can be angry but it's a fierce protective way!
not a way where they want to claw you open and eat your heart out.
maybe some are like this but our djinni are not.
people like to think in black and white and they forget all the shades of grey.
maybe things are done things that unsettle you but demons are like people because they are very intuitive and emotional.
some are more logical than others.
they have a different experience with morality too! 
and different things would register as threats.
they can be benevolent at one minute and cruel the next. 
sometimes cruelty is benevolent because the act protects from something!
sometimes things are done that seem harmful but to a demon it is not harmful it is meant to help you.
our djinni are proper allies! 
over time we learned who they are and what they want and why they are here.
that stuff made it easier to understand their behaviors!
so i think it's best not to demonize your demon just yet.
of course you can set boundaries in the subtle ways.
the lost girls who seem demonic have historical reasons for being that way.
like experiences that made them into that fashion.
the lost girls who present as demons are full of confusion and agony and hatred and pain and madness.
but our djinni have always been and always will be and their actions have a different sort of shape or scope.
your girl may be acting out from her own history or built up pain and anger and frustration and if that is the case there is something hurting beneath all the red.
if it is a djinni then it is probably working in mysterious ways to present you with lessons you have to unravel yourself.
but i am no authority on this at all i just think about what i have seen that's all.

The black flame does not know the lies of the light. The universe as it was known to us is a purgatory of shadowed flesh-bone tombs. Destruction sets creation in motion. It is the law of contrasts. To achieve pleasure by way of pain. Self torture as a portal to peace. Look deep and you will understand what is personified and hidden. But beware of what remains to be found.
Xul

Thanks for the added perspective Bones

galaxies wrote:


they are what we call guardian demons which is only half a joke!
...
dark beings are not always evil beings and some have no intention to harm you!
i think that is a human misconception or misunderstanding.
...
maybe things are done things that unsettle you but demons are like people because they are very intuitive and emotional.
some are more logical than others.
they have a different experience with morality too! 
and different things would register as threats.
...
the lost girls who present as demons are full of confusion and agony and hatred and pain and madness.

This was very enlightening and puts some things into perspective. We had an incident yesterday with Nymeria where she did some disturbing things and frightened a member of our system. This seems to shed a possible new light on her actions, and some reasons/motivation for her doing these things.




A few in our system are very wary about Nymeria and are not very enthused about spending very much time near her, much less trying to understand her motivations so it is looking like this task has fallen on me. She does have an appearance that many deem very frightening, but then again, so do I at times. I am hoping in time that she will come to be a bit more tame, as I came to be. I have been explaining the basic rights and rules of our system to her, and she seems to understand, but does not always act according to this understanding.

Foolish as many in our system believe it to be, I do have hope that she will be able to become a more functional member of our system instead of being solely destructive and unnerving. Thank you again to all who have answered and shared their experiences and perspectives.

She's so freaking creepy.