A flash of my inner world?

A few days ago, I blacked out like I always do with a switch. I can't remember who came out, I think it was Nadia. Anyway, my black out ended for a brief, two minute time and this is what I saw:

A dark cave with water dripping from the ceiling. A tunnel in this cave with a bright light at the end.

I'm pretty sure I was seeing my section of the inner world. Nadia told my husband that when I go into the inner world no one knows where I am, they can't reach me. So...yeah I think it was my special place, cause who would think to look for me deep within a cave?

Am I crazy to think this? Am I just using my imagination, I've got a vivid one? Or was this really my first time seeing my sight of the inner world?

Inner worlds are made from your imagination, so you'd need to use a bit of it to see it again, least it'd make sense to me if you had to and I'd imagine you would have to. I know we always do. It helps for us to actively imagine it because then it becomes easier for us to actually see it as it is.

The fact that you don't know exactly what your inner world looks like is a pretty huge clue to me that this isn't "just too much imagination" or something like that. Usually that takes time, effort to think up, effort to focus on, conscious effort, etc. It wouldn't be "black out then cave" just like that. I'd say this sounds to be exactly like seeing a part of your inner world, and it would definitely make sense if a cave was your little safe place.

I'd try to not over think this or get too worked up over it. If it's your inner world, as it sounds to be, you'll see it again eventually.


-KAT

Thank you, Kat. That's what I was thinking it to be, I just really needed some confirmation.

I haven't tried to consciously, with effort, access my inner world. How do I go about doing that? Do I just think really hard on it?

I'm used to meditating and accessing my astral space, but that's without effort. So I'm a little confused on how it works with this.

I agree with Kat. This sounds like your space indeed

I have had a couple of flashes of the inner world in picture form after coming out again, but nothing except that really. I've never been there that I can consciously remember, though the others tell I've been and they know where I live.

I hope to see it sometime.

You're making great progress in so short of time, I'm proud of you

lifelongthing wrote:You're making great progress in so short of time, I'm proud of you

Thank you. I tend to do that with stuff, I was the same when diagnosed with Bipolar. The only problem is I tend to make progress early then have a bit of a "crash and burn" period. It's up in the air if that'll happen now.

If you do, you have lots of others now to help you get out of it and work to heal even more Remember, you're not alone anymore and falling now includes having others to help you crawl back up again

wronglesson wrote:Thank you, Kat. That's what I was thinking it to be, I just really needed some confirmation.

I haven't tried to consciously, with effort, access my inner world. How do I go about doing that? Do I just think really hard on it?

I'm used to meditating and accessing my astral space, but that's without effort. So I'm a little confused on how it works with this.

It's a lot like meditation.

You get yourself into a calm, relaxed, safe-feeling place/state, and then you focus on things. You try to clear your mind of everything except for what you want to focus on. For us, focusing on picturing other alters can sometimes help us get inside, or focusing on picturing what we've seen/heard about the inner world, as that can help us get inside, too.


It can also happen without effort, as well, but this depends on the person and their system. For us, music is such a huge help with seeing images in our head, and that can helps us get inside a lot easier. Most of the time when we listen to music we've come to realize, we almost always end up inside, or watching things happen inside, to the music that's playing, and we've just never really realized that this is what was happening. Kyra explains it from her "Realization Vomit" thread, which I'll quote here:

"Maiingan explained that the best way to see and be in our inner worlds is to at least be listening to music, if not walking alone as well. The music helps our mental imagery and helps it to become clearer much easier, and walking helps us to "get lost" in ourselves, since we used to walk a lot just to walk, with no specific destination and only heading back when we felt like it (sometimes we'd walk for hours). Lately, with all the moving, we haven't been walking as often, much less walking alone while getting lost in music. So that explains a lot. She also explained that being alone for the walking is important because it's when we're alone that we feel safe to surface as we please, or we feel safe to truly get "lost" inside our inner world, and such."


We've found that music with little to no lyrics helps us reach our inner world best, as there's no lyrics to really trigger anyone specifically, and there's no lyrics to "influence" what happens inside or what we see or things like that (because when I say we see things happen to music, it includes lyrics. If there's a song about fighting, we've found that we either tend to replay memories we have about fighting, or we'll end up watching a fight going on inside that we didn't know about, or we'll replay memories from fights inside that we've had among each other, things like that).


Hope that helps some.


-KAT

You always know, even if you don't know, that its alters doing the walking..

The inner cave sounds so familiar... Im sure many of us can relate to that...

The truest destroyed me is in the deepest protection area.. I can now see him, as well as God taking care of him... And its much like a deep safe dark cave with the light shining through...

thank you Kat, i will try to pass the message on. we have some music on our arsenal that Jo could use, even some that has lyrics that aren't triggering for any of us. i don't know that Jo will be able to do more than walk around the apartment. we live downtown with a lot of bums that trigger Amelia out.

OMNICELL wrote:The truest destroyed me is in the deepest protection area.. I can now see him, as well as God taking care of him... And its much like a deep safe dark cave with the light shining through...

i'm sorry this helped destroy you. i do know that for Jo a dark and wet place has always been safe to her. we just haven't been able to find her place in the inner world cause the mountain Nadia live on has many caves.

Walking is just something that helps us. Your system could be different, you might not need to walk. It might even help you to just sit quietly/comfortably or something. Everyone's different. But at least the idea of walking is always there to try.

I know I've read on here that exercise/movement can be helpful with dissociation for a lot of people, and thus reaching the inner world. If this is true for you as well, maybe you guys could try other things instead of walking around outside, like pacing around the apartment, or going to a gym and walking on a treadmill with music on and eyes closed, or doing yoga in your apartment, or something like that.


Basically, find something that helps you to get "lost"/zone out, like sitting still, walking aimlessly, laying down, meditating, etc., and then add some music and see if that helps you reach inside at all.


-KAT