Every possible scenario in my head

Anything that I do I will run over it 100s of times in my head, thinking of every possible scenario that could happen. If I get one bad scenario, I won't do it, and this way of thinking prevents me, and I'm sure a lot more people on the forum from doing a whole lot of things that they actually want to do.

I'm currently thinking of getting some poster for my room of music that I like. I'm currently living with my parents at 18 and I have a brother that has some mutual friends. Ever since I began to transfer moeny into my paypal account for eBay (takes 6-8 days), I've gone through the scenarios 10000000 times in my head. What if my brother sees and tells my few friends that I have and they laugh at me, what if this, what if that, it's driving me insane.

I have to stop thinking about what other people might possibly think of me and focus on being me, not focus on what others think (I have heard this 1000s of times and I think it's getting to me, haha) the lifestyle will follow suit.

Even though I'm getting better at controlling this FEAR (false expectations appearing real), it's still really hard for me. I mean, who the hell is actually going to laugh and poke fun at me for liking music to the point it gets extremely uncomfortable? Anyone got any advice for someone like me?

I often experience similar feelings. I feel like people will make fun of the things I like or who I am as a person, so I hide everything. Plus, my sister and I share most of our friends, as well. Lately though, I've been teaching myself to just be me, instead of a copycat of everyone else. And it's hard. But it has really strengthened some of my relationships.

I would say, get the poster. It may be a lot easier said than done, but I believe you can do it. And if your friends laugh at you, you can laugh and say, "They weren't real friends anyway." Hope that helps.

So I ordered the posters and showed one of my caring friends. He said the first one was really good, the second one was less dirty, but still good. When he said less dirty but still good it tore at my insides. Why must rejection be so painful, it wasn't even rejection!

Don't take it personally; some people are strongly opinionated, no matter how hurtful it is. The only way you can deal with these people is by forgiving and forgetting. Kudos for getting the posters!!

Thanks for posting allalone, it's good to know someone understands and that I'm not going insane. I know that getting a poster for my room doesn't really mean a whole lot (I'm 18 for god sakes), but I can't get over what people think of me. Whenever anyone asks me my opinion I almost always say I don't care, I don't know, I try not to give away what I actually feel about anything, I let people make all my choices for me. Back when I was in highschool when you're past the whole girls are ick thing and everyone would say that she is so hot or whatever, but I still wouldn't tell anyone. Oh, who do you like? Nobody! Nobody is atractive to me! (Not true at all)

Oh my gosh! I feel like I'm reading about myself. Inside I have a lot of beliefs and opinions, but I'm scared to let people in on them. And as for the "who do you like" thing, I often do that. There was one guy I liked for a long time, but whenever someone asked me who I liked, I would shrug my shoulders and say no one. When someone asks me what is my favorite band or movie or whatever, I don't know what to say because I'm scared they'll judge me. I also hide my talents. No one really knows that I sing and want to do music for the rest of my life besides my best friend and family. When asked what I want to do when I'm older, I tell people I don't know because I'm afraid they'll think it's stupid.

So, yeah, you're not going insane. and if you are, then I'm going insane too

It's funny how you bring up you sing and want to become a singer. I love singing, listening to singers, all that good fun stuff, but I won't tell a soul, not my family, friends anyone, I sing when nobody is home. My family is so closed minded to things, anything that was different would be laughed at, if you changed something in your schedule you'd be laughed at by a sibling. I'd love to become a singer but I don't think I'd ever make it in this world, I'm so terrified when around people I couldn't ever do it.

I probably should have mentioned that the posters I order were from Korea, I listen to kpop music, girl groups, and nobody knows. I've been studying the language on my own in my spare time ever since I discovered the music and I just love it to death.

Lol, were we separated at birth? I don't sing in front of my family much. And if I do, it's so quiet you would have to strain your ears to hear it. My best friend has never heard me sing seriously. I just sing bad on purpose around other people.

I think the interest in Korea is really cool and unique. Their culture is intriguing.

allalone004 wrote:Lol, were we separated at birth?

I think the interest in Korea is really cool and unique. Their culture is intriguing.

Might as well be, haha.

What you just said really helps! every bit helps in trying to get out of this vault that I feel I'm in.

I'm glad that I can help

So, what sparked your interest in the language and stuff? I knew a foreign exchange student from Korea, once. She was really fun and sweet