Reaching out

I have feelings like I want to die.It's not a thoughtlike it was at first but a feeling and I feel like it's driving me really fast. I can't get rid of this and I've had more than enough.
I tried to tell my mother, she told me ###$ you, she can't handle any time anything goes wrong, ###$ you and go away and then she shhut the door in my face. I texted my friend - it's really hard to reach out to someone, and this is I guess is wht I am trying to do here. My friends mad at me, I think and she is my only friend - and she hasn't answered me and it's been over a day. I just feel like I don't know what to do, people say all the time when people kill themselves - shame they felt they had no one to talk to, but I swear people don't WANT to hear it. I'm trying, I am trying but if it gets to this because no one wants to listen.

Hey, I understand how you are feeling. Also, trust me, there are people out there who are willing to listen to and help you. Your mother is obviously not one of them, so just ignore her. If you haev friends who have also been unwilling to help/listen, then also ignore those. Coming here is a good idea because you will meet like-minded people - i.e. people who have also been 'rejected' by friends and family during their time of need.

Thoughts of death, I believe, can be confused with thoughts of lacking hope in life. I don't believe that anyone truly wants to die ... if they could change certain aspects of their lives, then they would be willing to live out the rest of their lives. So, what do you think that you could change in your life right now to set in in the right direction?

Kevin