Newbie here

Hi all,
I have a problem with compulsive lying. I've told lies over the most ridiculous things. I think I've done it in the past to make me seem more interesting to some people.
It came to a head at the start of the summer when I caused a lot of hurt to a former friend of mine with a huge stupid lie.
I made a decision to stop. I think I've been around two months now without telling a lie and since I made that decision I've been an a lot more positive about things in my life.

I'm delighted to have this forum where I can say what I've done without judgement and I'm sure I'll be using this frequently in the time to come.

Hi Magoo,

Welcome! I think your making the right step. I too am a compulsive liar. I've been on this forum for a few months now and your right it is good to come and talk about and admitting your problem without judgment. I hate the person I am, been this type of person has really hurt me as well as my family. Me and my wife tend to have a lot of arguments because of my past and my current state. I haven't lied in a few months now. Even thou I haven't lied, I'm still treated as if I just have. But this post isn't about me, if you want to know about me check my post. Again I'm glad your here, that's the first step to recover. This forum will definitely assist you in your journey.

J.R.

Thank you for the welcome John and I've just been reading your posts. A lot of your reasons for lying seem very similar to mine - wanting to fit in, wanting to be liked etc. I've never lied to my husband over big things (apart from when we first started dating but I came clean when we started getting serious) but I haven't admitted compulsively lying and I'm afraid to because we have a very happy marriage and I don't want him to look at me in a different light. So I'm in a bit of a quandary about whether I should just tell him I have had a problem with this or just stay doing my best not to do it anymore.

I did have a bit of a lapse yesterday but as soon as I had told the lie I actually just said to the person I was talking to "I'm sorry that's not true I don't know why I said it" and I got a much more positive response than I was expecting. The person in question said "Hey no problem we all do that from time to time." And to be honest even though I didn't know what the reaction was going to be I felt relief when I said that it wasn't true. It felt like a release or felt like I was starting to break free of the cycle - that even though I had lied I owned up to it straight away and didn't let it grow.
I'm just trying to take one day at a time now, And I notice I've become much more careful about what I say - I tend to think the sentence I'm about to say out full in my head to make sure it's 100% true before I say it out loud.

Magoo,

That's really good you admitted to lying. I feel your way ahead of schedule. One thing I would like to add thou, is I really think you should admit your probably to your husband. I say this because you don't want any secrets in your marriage. It will come to light and it's something you should be able to tell him. Again, I think this forum will really help in many ways.

j.r.