Blabber mouth feel stupid

I've been good the whole of today. Amazingly! Went for a run. First time in 6 months felt good. Went out to celebrate with a friend. Got drunk as hadn't eaten, ate a meal, felt bad, threw it up, then ended up telling her about stuff thats happened to me sexually. Never told anyone before, it just slipped out and feel really awful. Thought I'd blanked it out? home now in bed trying to stop myself doing something bad. Help!

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. I'm a bit curious as to why telling your friend about that experience made you feel bad?

Perhaps a part of you wanted to tell them/someone? Don't feel bad that you told them, you can't change what's happened, if you're worried about what they're thinking, you can talk to them once you're feeling up to it.
Well done for going for a run, it's such an achievement, I know from experience, hope you keep it up.
Hope you feel better soon x

hey,

I'm very sorry you had such a horrible experience! it is actually very common when people have suffered sexual abuse (as children or adults, doesn't matter) to feel bad when telling someone about it, even if the other person is understanding. That has to do with the way abuse works - it makes the survivor feel guilty and bad about themselves instead of the abuser.

Actually I think you did a very brave thing, even if you were drunk! Don't let the bad feelings get you down, this is all quite normal in the healing process.

Is there perhaps a rape crisis hotline or so in your area? Those things are anonymous and you can get help and advice there about the way you feel. If you don't want to talk to them any more, you just hang up and you can call as many times as you want. Very often, the people who work there have experienced rape or abuse themselves, so they understand how you feel.

xx, leFaye

Vanna, feel like by saying it, I embarrassed myself, that I shouldn't have been so stupid and been in that particular situation that I was describing, and also that it just makes my friend probably think I'm more of a loser than she already knows!

-- Sun Jun 10, 2012 7:45 am --

Thanks yo yo and leafy. Xoxox not feeling so great today but what's done is done I guess. Can't really take it back now.